Cuckolding – the least sexy word for one of the sexiest fetishes

Image by the excellent Stuart F Taylor

Oh for the love of a man who wants to watch me fuck other men.

For a guy whose idea of heaven is the gentlest of touches on his aching erection as he leaks precum and sheds a solitary tear while I’m fucked rigid by a faceless other.

Cuckolding is one of the hottest fetishes, and one of the most dangerous, and I love it for both of these reasons, along with the simpler explanation that it’s a guilt-free, enticing shag with someone brand new and different.

I used to know a guy who was into this. Who struggled with his desire to keep and hold me, at the same time as his throbbing need to hear stories of me getting used by other men. We used to fuck while we talked about it. Long, slow, trembling shags during which I’d whisper in his ear…

“He beat me with a slipper, you know. He pulled my knickers down in the hallway and slapped me with it. All the time his other hand fondling me – running up under my shirt and squeezing my tits and exploring my body the way you usually do.”

A moan. A twitch as he thrust further into me.

“His cock was pretty thick, you know. Satisfying, just like yours is now. Filling me up and stretching me.”

He moans again. He doesn’t cry – now. But later he will. As he rubs his dick and pictures the scene – a vivid image of my face, contorted with lust and desire, thinking only of getting fucked by someone who isn’t him. He might cry even as he’s coming, and eventually that picture is what pushes me over the edge while we’re fucking. As I squeeze him between my legs and imagine his tortured confusion.

Cuckolding isn’t weakness

When I’ve discussed cuckolding with people before, some have turned their nose up at the idea that it represents weakness – a lack of self-esteem and a desire to be ‘punished’ for imagined failings. That those who get turned on by the idea of their partner fucking someone else are somehow constantly miserable. Feeling undeserving of love and so only able to enjoy it if they know it comes with the promise of betrayal. Maybe betrayal hurts less if you fetishise it.

I don’t think it’s that though. Guys I know who’ve enjoyed it cite a range of reasons why it’s hot: they get off on their partner’s pleasure. They get off on the pure visual of it: watching two people fuck and knowing exactly what one of them likes – like a personalised, explicit live show performed just for them. And some of them – yes – they like the conflict. In a world that teaches us that sex is precious – a gift you give to those you love and keep hidden from everyone else – then of course there’ll be excitement in watching that rule be broken.

Diary of a Library Nerd – specifically the cuckolding bit

This week I read a properly filthy book, in which the protagonist (a super-horny library worker) explores BDSM in a far more interesting way than Christian Grey did. She dominates a young guy, and is dominated by someone much older, and in the course of her sticky fucking she reminded me of just how hot I get at the idea of cuckolding.

I won’t give away too much of the book – if you want a copy it’s obviously available from Amazon, or from the publisher Sweetmeats Press. And I’ll take this opportunity to say that it was given to me for free, because I’m one of those people that publishers tend to give stuff for free to. Despite an impressive level of persuasion (Joe from Sweetmeats deserves a pay rise, if anyone’s listening) I’m not actually going to review it, but I’m more than happy to give it a mention because it sparked interesting stuff in my mind.

There’s a section of the book where the main character explores cuckolding. After a couple of hints to her submissive about what she’s been up to with her dominant, her sub begins pacing the room in a whirling conflict of jealousy and lust.

“What did you do with him?” is quickly followed by “tell me more…” and as soon as the second sentence came out I got a kick in the gut of pure horny delight, reminded of all those whispered dirty-talking fucks in which I regaled a guy with tales of others.

Cuckolding isn’t inherently submissive (or inherently male)

Alongside the ‘weakness’ thing, cuckolding is often seen as something only submissive men enjoy. Akin to a punishment (or sometimes a back-handed treat) that they’ll accept gratefully, on their knees and glistening with humiliated need. But I don’t think it has to be that way. The idea of being ‘shared’ by a dominant turns me on just as much, if not more – the explicit fantasy I have of being tied down as something to be used at a party thrown by my partner. Being passed around a group of men while my partner looks on – proud rather than humiliated. Generous rather than exploited.

Although there is a word for the gender-swapped position – cuckqueaning – I very rarely hear this fetish talked about from a female perspective, or the perspective of anyone in a relationship other than a straight one. Perhaps because so often the cuckolding is linked to humiliation, and while in the past it was considered intensely humiliating for a wife to cheat on her husband, our lopsided, assumptions-based sexual narrative tells us that it’s ‘to be expected’ that most men will cheat on their wives.

Whatever the reason for the imbalance, I’m pretty damn lucky to have met men who get off on this kind of play. For me, there’s an intense deliciousness in desperation, and the combination of sadness and desire that radiates from someone who wants you but who just has to wait. Not to mention that the exhibitionism of being watched having sex, and the ability to share a disgustingly filthy fantasy without breaking hearts. Oh, and the chance to fuck other men and know that the only repercussion will be a week’s worth of languid, dirty-talking reminiscence fucks as he quivers with the need to know every excruciating detail…? Yeah, cuckolding is pretty damn hot.

As long as I’m on the right side of it, of course.

69 Comments

  • Coquine Elle says:

    I loved this post. The mister and I have a cuckolding aspect to our relationship and reading this left me feeling tingly. :)

  • Taylor says:

    It sounds so hot when you write it like that, but I could never. I’m mildly uncomfortable being watched, maybe I’d get into it, but it feels like I’d just end up awkward and self-conscious. Maybe someday if I’m feeling adventurously drunk ;)

  • Yes it is such a horrid word isn’t it. And I’ve always felt it never really describes what that situation is about.
    Not that I have ever been able to come-up with a one-word alternative . . . but, of course, that has never stopped me from frequently indulging! With Hubby’s attendance, excitement and enjoyment. LOL!!!
    Xxx – K

  • Stephanie says:

    There’s something delicious about the fantasy of my husband watching me fuck another girl. Or maybe he stays in one room while we fuck in the other. I don’t think I could fuck another guy, though. That’s just me.

  • Paul says:

    Thank you GOTN. I am with a cuckquean, we have been together for the past nine years. She has only been cuckqueaning for the past two but my god have we had some fun with it. I’m not a sub, if any thing much more towards a Dom but I have been sent out to fuck other women with and without her.
    To start it was strange,,,, I struggled for a while to accept the fact I was actually allowed to break the taboo, to go out and fuck another, any other as much as I wanted without any repercussions or judgment. The only condition was I must recal my experience at a later date in as much detail as possible while my rock hard shaft is being deep throated and then sat on by my ever willing partner as she moans and whimpers in the delight of my tail.
    I struggled with the fact it was wrong but yet so right, the guilt, like the whole of society was watching as I was cheeting on my loving partner faithful partner who would do any thing for me and has don’t so much for me over the years. ‘wasn’t she enough you ungrateful bastard’ I imagined them silently shouting at me as I’m balls deep in another woman’s tight wetness.
    Now I get it. Now I love it and can’t wait to find the next willing woman so I can go out for the evening and have hours of fun with just so I can get back to more of the same as I’m asked to describe and repeat what I have just done in every orgasmic detail I can!!!! So how was she? Kneel down in front of me and lick the remnence of her pussy of my used cock and I will tell you every thing you want to know! That’s it good girl!!!! God I love being in a loving relationship with a cuckquean!!!!! No!!!! Scratch that!!! I love the fact a cuckquean is in love with me!!

    • Girl on the net says:

      Thank you so much for sharing this! I think it’s quite rare to see stories of cuckqueaning, and cuckolding seems to be the most common form, so it’s great to hear your experience. I can totally see why it was a struggle to get past the judgments around e.g. cheating etc, but delighted that you’re both having so much fun with it!

  • H.H. says:

    You had me at the line, “throbbing need to hear stories of me getting used by other men.” Wonderful post!

    • Sunshine says:

      Fantastic to read this! Took me a while to come around to this when my Boyf first mentioned it. The idea of fucking another guy, didn’t sit well with me for so many reasons.

      However, my experience of it has been HOT! I get to fuck guys who bring something new to the bedroom, or hotel room, or wherever. Boyf gets to fulfil a fantasy, while also watching me enjoy myself.

      It has opened up all sorts of possibilities now, and I’ve been curious about exploring the same thing with another girl for a while. The thought has always got me wet and being able to ‘report back’ or have him watch is a really exciting idea. Just got to find the right girl now……

  • Heather says:

    I had a friend with what I suppose would be called a “cuckholding” fetish, but he got off on having his partner go out and fuck another man without a condom (only with certain partners already determined to be safe), then come over still filled with other man’s cum so he could fuck her and cum inside her. The way I understood it, for him it was similar to sperm competition in certain animal species: he who cums last, wins. By being the last man to fuck her, he essentially “beats out” other men, thus establishing his sexual superiority. Far from a submissive position!

  • Mimieux says:

    I remember the first time ex Daddy (the one that started it all off) told me about fucking another woman whilst I was in Spain… and because I wasn’t madly in love with him, I felt this weird rush, this thrill of anticipation as he told me the story, I knew what was coming (hah!!), I wanted him to stop, but this shiver and this perverted desire to hear more was what kept me listening. I’ve never really liked the idea of being cheated on, but I suppose cuckolding is totally different, it’s consensual and it is pretty fucking hot. I’d love for my partner to host a party and I be the offering, the spread, in the middle of the table, whilst he looked on, as you say, proudly. Sadly my experience of long term relationships where this would be A Thing is limited, so have yet to try that one out! :(

  • andrew says:

    While not the same thing, exactly, I have similar positive experiences with a similar situation. Both I and my female partner are pansexual and before becoming partners agreed that polyamory was allowed if it wasn’t with the same gender as our partner. Lately, she has been seeing another girl regularly and splits her time spending the night over there and at our home with me. Jealousy has been a non-issue, but it’s been very exciting for the both of us.
    I think it de-fetishizes the stereotypical lesbian fantasies of straight cisgender men since this is a partner she is interested in just as much as me (and I guess could therefore, be seen as “competition?”). I almost feel like it’s a nonthreatening introduction to cuckolding, which, while the thought turns me on, wonder how I would handle it.

    That said, our sex has has improved from an already very good place. Hearing her recount their stories turns us both on, and her confidence has increased greatly being loved and fucked by the both of us.

  • anon says:

    Very, very hot, as you’d put it… unngh.

    One ex-girlfriend once mention (whilst squirming in pleasure) how hot it was to have many man… because when ‘one got tired another could take over’. It’s crazy, but I agree.

  • Sunshine says:

    Fantastic to read this! Took me a while to come around to this when my Boyf first mentioned it. The idea of fucking another guy, didn’t sit well with me for so many reasons.

    However, my experience of it has been HOT! I get to fuck guys who bring something new to the bedroom, or hotel room, or wherever. Boyf gets to fulfil a fantasy, while also watching me enjoy myself.

    It has opened up all sorts of possibilities now, and I’ve been curious about exploring the same thing with another girl for a while. The thought has always got me wet and being able to ‘report back’ or have him watch is a really exciting idea. Just got to find the right girl now……

  • Vida says:

    It’s interesting that this word has (I think?) been relegated to porn vocab only – we don’t really consider it day to day any more, do we? My Italian students all ask me what the word for having horns (finger to the head gesture!) is, which to me is totally Shakespearian, it’s not a metaphor we use any more, correct me if I’m wrong, but both the horn thing and the word itself seem a bit archaic outside a porn context.

    So for me, perhaps it means that the macho concept of being unmanned by your partner sleeping with someone else is over, we’ve moved on that bit, and it just lingers as a little bit of pride/shame play in our racial and sexual memory?

  • seasideslut says:

    Cuckolding would solve a lot of my sexual connundrums but I’ve never found a bloke who was willing. And there’s something about it, especially how you’ve described it here, that just breaks my heart.

  • J says:

    Your interpretations of this fetish benefit you. That is your motive for concluding “I don’t think it’s that (low self esteem) So rather than introspectively looking at your blatantly obvious histrionic personality traits, which sometimes cross over into sadism, you conveniently deflect that you are giving someone what they want and then cleansing yourself of any accountability by assuming it has nothing to do with low self esteem. In short, you are enabled by someone you are emotionally exploiting. There is nothing commendable about that. Just because someone has a fetish, doesn’t mean you give a damn about their well being. You are clearly a me first person and the way you describe emotionally torturing someone makes me wonder if you’re a covert sociopath. Furthermore creating a blog so you can have a harem of followers further reinforces your narcissism. I would bet my GD life that you have a cluster B personality disorder. Are a predator and you manipulate the hell out of guys with repressed insecurity/abandonment complexes no different than a person feeding drugs to someone with a dependency problem. Congrats. You’re life is really purposeful.

    • Vida says:

      Wow.

      And, ‘a harem of followers’? Is that the official collective noun?

      I need to get me some more followers. And then I’ll install them in a steam bath type area with pillars and palm fronds. Lots of chiffon and silk. Diaphanous, it’ll be.

  • Vida says:

    Actually, if you weren’t being so offensive, there might be something worth talking about in your comment. Eh, I kind of wrote a blog post a little bit about this the other day.

    Here’s the thing – human beings have brains that psychologise sex. Sometimes it’s all to the good, and sometimes it can be more negative. You’re assuming a fetish that is born of low self esteem is bad, and that finding someone to help you play with that fetish means you’re automatically being exploited.

    What’s the alternative? Therapy? Aversion therapy? Until your self esteem is squeaky clean and you don’t want to be humiliated anymore? Hmm.

    The reality is, sometimes you’re right. And people do not feel good after having sex that indulges their fantasies.

    Here’s the thing though – sex is psychological. What turns us on is emotional. Hetero, emotionally healthy men are turned on by tits. Don’t pretend that’s not about your mother and breastfeeding, and the early survival urge that pushes you to find your mother’s breasts for comfort and sustenance. Does that make me exploitative if I enjoy feeding my nipples to someone, enjoy their need and the physical pleasure it gives me?

    Sometimes desire gets rerouted in a more complex, less comfortable way. I believe a lot of kinky people who explore their fetishes are actually working through and owning whatever emotional experience in their lives made them turned on by what they fetishise. I’ve read a lot of stories of people getting over rape, violence, degredation in their lives by exploring it in a safe sexual space where they’re cared for and looked after. And they get pleasure, and own it.

    Yes, there are exploitative people out there. But so too with any sex, be it kinky or not. To pretend otherwise, as in your comment, is pompous and unrealistic. And your attack is so personal and insulting, that I suspect you need to look more closely at your own issues, here. Maybe get some help dealing with them…

    • S says:

      Reading this post a year later, he is totally spot on and you sound ultra defensive. Maybe you should own up to your exploitation instead of calling his argument a personal attack? It’s what you are doing, don’t try to put a sweet face on it just so you feel better. Your man cries when he comes and this turns you on? That’s a red flag if I ever saw one.

      I thought J made some good points and your reply reminds me of someone doing something wrong and got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. And apparently what’s good for the goose isn’t good for the gander? So much for egalitarianism. Just my two cents.

      • Girl on the net says:

        “apparently what’s good for the goose isn’t good for the gander?”

        Thing is, not everyone has the same kinks. My other half loves getting head – I don’t. So in this instance we decide that we’ll indulge his kink without making me indulge in it’s equivalent, because it wouldn’t be massively fun for me. Likewise with things like cuckolding – it’s a power dynamic, and it’s unequal, and that is where the hotness comes from. Where things *are* equal – and always should be – are on the level of informed, enthusiastic and respected consent. This means both people being aware of how the other one feels about things, checking in regularly etc etc, discussing fetishes and then respecting their partner’s choices.

        This is even more important with something like cuckolding – and the last part is as important as the rest. Consent is absolutely meaningless if you don’t respect someone’s choices – and that includes the choice to do things which make them cry. Personally I’ve played in LOADS of scenes which have either ended with me in tears, or included tears somewhere down the line. It is often part of what makes it hot. I feel like you – and J above – maybe don’t get why this might be hot or why someone would want this in their sex play, which is fine of course, but it does mean that conclusions you draw about the intentions of people who *do* enjoy that are likely to be based on your own personal opinions rather than on their desires and choices.

  • Nick says:

    As a pervy guy, the idea of watching my wife getting fucked by someone else is such a turn on. I don’t know why, but it never ceases to give me an instant stiffy. The thought of joining in afterwards is horny beyond belief!

  • Jonny says:

    Hi,hope you don’t mind a man joining in your conversations.
    I am a husband who enjoys my wife having sexual intimacy with other men.
    We have been married for 30 years and i can honestly say it has enhanced not only our sex lives but life in general.
    She is her own person and if she wants to make love with another man thats fine with me.
    I have no fears of her leaving me for someone else, because she knows i am not going to critisize her for doing what comes naturally and knows that she can come home with no problems about jealousy or recriminations.
    I am still aroused when she has another man, even after all this time.
    Sexual intimacy is probably the most intense pleasure in life. I love my wife and knowing that she has pleasure with other men gives me pleasure.
    When she has a lover, she seems to enjoy life more, is definitely easier to live with because she seems happier and more confident.
    I know many people will think I’m crazy or maybe even perverted, but it works for us and hope to continue our “weird” relationship forever.

  • mguy says:

    I am a self employed and decently attractive male in my late 30s. I enjoyed a cuckolding relationship with my ex even though it was not consensual in the beginning (but that just added to the humiliation which I later became addicted to). I do not like to watch so much as just having a submissive role and knowing that my girlfriend can cheat on me whenever she wants (or even flirt with other men in front of me). If you seek a man who is into this sort of stuff or just have questions feel free to contact me.

  • Matt says:

    “Yeah, cuckolding is pretty damn hot. As long as I’m on the right side of it, of course.” LOL reminds me of a ex girlfriend I had. She told me she had this fetish wanted me to watch her with another guy, I told her sure as long as we also switch and have her watch me with another girl. She quickly drop this fetish and moved on to something a little more monogamous.

  • BOb says:

    “He doesn’t cry – now. But later he will. As he rubs his dick and pictures the scene – a vivid image of my face, contorted with lust and desire, thinking only of getting fucked by someone who isn’t him. He might cry even as he’s coming, and eventually that picture is what pushes me over the edge while we’re fucking. As I squeeze him between my legs and imagine his tortured confusion.” That’s the passage I find problematic. The fucking might be great but if my partner cried whilst coming I wouldn’t think of it as a good thing.

    Coincidentally, Dan Savage recently featured a letter from a man who found himself tortured but turned on when he found out his wife had been unfaithful to him. The man wrote that the sex was amazing but he still felt betrayed and upset that his partner had not first asked for his consent. DS’s reply was that they should talk it through whilst continuing to enjoy the hot sex. I remain unconvinced. Maybe therapy would be a better option, because those feelings rarely just ‘go away’; rather, they build up until they can’t be suppressed any longer leading to an unhealthy emotional outburst, or they mutate into an addiction to humiliation – as you acknowledge in your blog. I’m guessing here, but people who need someone to take a shit on them to get off probably didn’t start with that fetish and I worry that the normalisation of sexual humiliation means a lot of people are treating their illness with analgesics.

    BTW I myself enjoy daydreaming about my wife enjoying other men, but I know that for me it’s best that it remains a fantasy, (also, my wife has zero interest in cuckolding).

    • Girl on the net says:

      Hey Bob – it’s OK, it doesn’t have to be your thing. I struggle with your leap from ‘I don’t like it’ to ‘therefore people who are doing it are damaging themselves’ though. There are a lot of things to consider when indulging different kinks and fetishes, and I don’t ever just leap into things without thinking about them, discussing them with my partners, etc etc. Maybe for some people therapy is the right move if they have underlying problems. Maybe for others it’s perfectly healthy to engage in sex that they love.

      • Matthew says:

        And maybe some people are just willing to overlook another person’s fundamental emotional damage if it serves their own selfish interests.

        There are many perfectly valid explanations for the fetish, mostly based in biology, and by those explanations cuckolding is essentially a rebellion against the monopoly of monogamy.

        The idea of being actually *turned on* by another person’s crying though, especially during pleasure, cannot be written off by biology. That is emotional damage.

        • Girl on the net says:

          No, again – just because you don’t understand it doesn’t mean the people who do, and who get pleasure from it, are ‘damaged’ or wrong. Fetish and kink is always going to be a lot more complex than simply ‘X is good’ or ‘X is appalling.’

  • Maury Dowd says:

    My wife of over 30 years has booked a vacation in Jamaica for us in March. For the past year or so she has been interested in latin music and videos. Last night I watched a video that she bought through Amazon and I found it to be very enlightening. The main theme was about a married American wife vacationing on a Caribbean island and drawn into the local culture. She spends time at local clubs dancing and being seduced by younger men. The movie is not rated but sexually graphic showing her lusting for the island men. I am now wondering if my wife has ulterior motives for the upcoming vacation. I have been kind of turned on thinking about what is on her mind and any special hopes or plans. Should I address this with her in advance or wait and see how it plays out? I am now looking forward to the vacation more than I had been before.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Blimey. Well, I think you’re making quite a few links from just one video on Amazon, but it may be that you’ve had other conversations and things. If I were you I’d definitely raise it – if something’s going to happen it’s always best that everyone has had the chance to chat beforehand and you both know what the other is after/comfortable with.

      Edited to add: whatever happens, I hope you both have a wonderful holiday!

  • SaraSven says:

    We have been enjoying the cuckold lifestyle for over a year now. Our bond has never been stronger. Our sex is better now too. To top it off, I can have a larger cock whenever I want. It’s a win-win for both of us.

  • Cuck0ldR says:

    Man, I would kill for my GF to agree to cuckold experiences … Our sex life has been struggling as Im a pansexual cuckold lover with strong foot fetish, while she has very standard preferences … We have 2 kids and love each ther madly, sex life however isn’t the best anymore since I’ve realised what REALLY turn me on. I would absolutely love to watch her have sex with well built ebony man while licking her asshole (which she loves) and guys testicles … Also would lick her feet to make her feel even more fulfilled while getting drilled, although she prefers to leave her feet alone … In general she thinks having sex with another man would be extremely exciting but might put me in the shadow and make her desire me significantly more and in effect ruin our relationship …

    What do you guys thinks about the situation?

    • Wow, Cuck0ldR, your story is nearly EXACTLY as mine… Except my wife hasn’t agreed to anything like that, she reckons such activities would’ve ruined our relationship. Our sex life has been in the ditch for about 1 or 2 years (depending how you would look at it). I would be absolutely over the moon to see her coming repeatedely on another big stiff cock, especially ebony, with me licking her ass and feet, and the guys cock if she agreed to it (very unlikely), along with me licking the cum off her body clean. She has a bit conservative view on sex and it’s very, very hard to even talk to her about any threesome/swinger/orgy action. She says she would have definitely enjoyed it if she was single (as it sounds very exciting to her), but is too afraid to lose the bond within the relationship because of it in the current circumstances.. She fears of jealousy and curiosity of shagging other people to take over our hearts and being bored and unable to go back to normal life after such an encounter. She’s afraid of getting fucked by a man that would do it better than me, so she wouldn’t want to have sex withme anymore. In fairness, she’s probably right as I’m not the best in bed.

      What do you guys think? Is there a way of persuading her to get some pleasure im front of me, or is it simply not going to happen?

  • Cuck0ldR says:

    Ok now the typos … Sorry.

    What really turns me on.

    … And make her desire me significantly LESS and in effect …

  • AP says:

    You people are fucking disgusting, and anybody that lets you cuckold them knowingly is a beta faggot.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Sounds like we’re all having much more fun than you, though. Sorry about that. Sending hugs and best wishes that things pick up for you soon. xxx

  • Curvylover says:

    Thanks for the great blog and the real post, ive been into this lifestyle since 2010, real cuckold to my hotwife, i have much to share, and many real stories, u can ask whatever u want if this will help u.
    Love

  • Jess says:

    I’m a cuckquean and I love it. I don’t find it humiliating or upsetting, though I have been known to get overwhelmed by positive emotions which can sometimes lead to tears. I love watching my partner with other people, and hearing all about their sexual enjoyment. There’s a D/s element that plays into it too as part of my fantasy is being the submissive who is solely owned whilst my dominant partner takes their fulfilment where they like.

    I always make the point that it was me asking my partner to try this. It’s my fetish and I happily own that. It’s led to some incredible scenes, new relationships, new friendships and new experiences for us both. I can’t imagine a consensual cucking relationship not being led by the cuck (regardless of submissive or dominant tendencies).

  • Anon says:

    This post has made me feel so much more secure in stepping into the world of Cuckolding. Do you have any advice for me…I recently had a spontaneous experience with a man who was willing to fulfil this fantasy for my fiance and I. I have been in contact with him since on and off through messaging. My fiance wants us to meet again at some point and this time it would be planned. How do I keep this other man’s attention? He has much more experience than us and, I’m sure, many other women.

  • Kody Cyn says:

    I am considered a cuck. I am 24 and my fiance is 20 we have done this 2 times. I still feel really weird about it because I was raised in the bible belt where everything like this is wrong but I really love it. It is something I try to fight off but can’t. I love watching her with other men

    • Street says:

      I am having my first taste of this in 2 days. I have very high self esteem. I am a guy in my 30’s who has always, even to this day, been able to get any girl I want. My partner is unbelievably attractive and is going to blow the mind out of some average looking guy this Friday…. why ? Because we can! …. the reason we? …. because we trust each other 100%

  • Anon says:

    So just to premise this I’m hoping to learn here, not judge. I’m a young male (23 years old) and whilst I’ve explored a lot of kinks, cuckolding is one I feel some deep, raw insecurity and pain over. Weird thing is I’ve never been in a relationship before, never mutually loved someone, and yet even just reading this blog shatters me.

    Recently I was talking to a person I was dating and I found out they had done group sex parties before, in fact fairly often, and to my surprise I found myself intimidated. I imagined watching this girl I was madly interested in having sex with another, and I was filled with an unyielding rage :( yet partially turned on by the prospect of her being pleasured more with someone else than myself… But at the same time RAGE! Haha

    Reading your blog I think pinpointed a deep insecurity in me, that if I finally meet someone and love them, and trust them, to then find out they like cuckold/sex parties etc… Well I would want to let them enjoy their fantasies, I’d want to enjoy it mutually as I’ve always been about open mindedness, but I’d feel like I’ve have to surrender my heart just to have it dashed against the ground by the person I love to let them enjoy it…

    So after that soul searching essay (I got sidetracked, sue me (but don’t really)) I guess… with perhaps the perspective in mind of someone who *hasn’t* had a relationship before talking about a fetish centred on relationship, what do you lot think? What do you think the source of my rage is, and should I do anything about it? Like seriously I’d try and beat a guy bloody if I saw him with my love, even if I ended up getting bloodier. Yet reading comments from females on how they find it liberating… And from men where they say their relationship has never been stronger… I can’t understand how you don’t feel like your heart has been irrevocably shattered, even mutilated to used stronger language perhaps… By your love…

    All opinions welcome x

  • Laura says:

    This is beautiful, thank You Girl on the net! As a single, in shape and health conscious independent woman and caring mother in her early forties, I have enjoyed and been fascinated by the Cuckolding lifestyle since my early teens. For us into Cuckolding, it is a certain type of a balanced threesome, a definite and specific relationship where all parties are involved. Willing cucks, willing Bulls, and I as a willing Cuckoldress is the only world the three of us are interested in, no one elses, for we get each other. And it works very, very well for us.

  • Laura says:

    And yes please, a future post soon on reader ideas for renaming this lifestyle fetish something a bit sexier maybe? Thanks!

  • Elli Sanders says:

    Is it true that women that start down this path in a psychological and even in biology way twist the mind of their cuckold to want sex less at times and become submissive to more masculine men? It effectively separates the true cuckolds that are meant to raise the hotwives babies and the alpha males?

    I’ve been seeing this in a couple relationships that I know personally… weirdly they only know a bit of online banter about cuckolding, but the husbands are relinquishing their sexual rights to allow their wives to find the proper alpha male to impregnate them, and the one couple that is already pregnant with a bull baby are very interesting to talk with. The husbands are only interested in blowing their loads while their wives mate with their alpha or the preggo couple, the husband will softly rub her belly while they are both naked, and he will blow his load while he spoons her or in doggy position but will not penetrate, they all say the orgasm is more intense not going in, and they feel it’s the right of the wife and the alpha to continue mating to keep the baby health.

    Of course it’s hard to find anything on this online because it’s a lot of fucking bullshit fantasies… I’m looking for the real legit biological tendencies that happen without online fantasies around this natural occurrence. I mean, I do porn as a hobby so I REALLY know the crazy stuff out there.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Saying ‘here’s some insight into why you like this’ with a link to NoFap is like saying ‘here’s why you should only have sex within marriage’ with a link to a bible quote.

      I’ve let your comment through because it’s an interesting opinion, but the post you link to is no more than wild speculation, and I am extremely sceptical about the principles underlying the ‘NoFap’ movement. If someone wants to not wank, that’s totally their shout and good luck to them – but to demonise porn and masturbation to the level that NoFap does is downright harmful imo.

      • Peadlepusher says:

        My boyfriend mentioned this to me a while back when we were going though a dry spell and it totally shattered me because at the time for me it compounded the fact that he didn’t want me. We have worked though a lot of issues in relationship therapy only to come out the other side realising that my sex drive is through the roof and his is tepid (or maybe hes just not getting what he wants). Ur post has helped me and im going to broach the subject tomorrow because we both might end up with a little bit of what we want x

  • Chuck the one-time cuck says:

    many many years ago in around 1986 with my ex-wife, i began to have the cuck fantasy. i’m not submissive at all, but very confident and love to fuck. at age 15 (before the internet) i found my dad’s porn stash. fantastic movies – behind the green door, autobiography of a flea, among others and i started buying the most fantastic mags – oui, penthouse, hustler. i was sexualized young and loved seeing women getting fucked. especially by guys with huge dicks. i got married young, to a girl where our sex life was amazing! i started fantasizing about her fucking someone with a big dick and then sometime later i shared the fantasy. it was a wild turn-on for me and just about every time we had sex, the fantasy came out. at first she didn’t seem interested, but as time went on, she liked it and we would talk at length about her getting fucked, me watching, and it went as far as for me to ask her to call someone and try and have phone sex while i was in her, fucking her slow. she obliged. wow! that was mind blowing. so that’s how it started and it got really hot. definitley increased the voracity of our sex life. then one night she mentioned she saw a guy that worked at a nearby store that had a huge bulge. i told her to get his phone number and she should call him late at night while we were fucking. she did and we did. holy crap! the next day she said she had a convo with him and he was indeed quite interested in doing her. ok. that was it. we fucked several times a day for a few days in a row and we would talk thru this whole thing. i told her to go and fuck him and to proceed ONLY if she agreed to tell me every single detail. she agreed. so the next day i came home from work and she was in the bedroom just waiting for me to come home. when i walked in the bedroom, i gulped and felt very queasy. she was wearing the sexiest teddy and it was definitely going to happen. her pussy was amazing! she was an incredible fuck. nice big clit and she knew how to orgasm. she could take every inch of anything and just an amazing vagina. anyway, she put on a short skirt, heels and a blouse and left. it was not about my pleasure, but her own. the idea of getting pounded by a stranger with a big dick drove her to leave that night. i didn’t know if i was ok with it, but i had no choice – she left. there were no cell phones then, so it was on. i had an uneasy feeling that night, but understood i was a horny son of a gun and went with it.

    she came home about four hours later. i was in bed waiting and completely owned – she owned me – that night owned me. i didn’t know if she went thru with it, but was very eager to learn. she stayed downstairs for a few minutes to get a drink or something then came up to the bedroom. i layed there on my back acting like i was asleep, with one eye cracked watching. she took off her blouse and skirt and i saw her teddy was unsnapped at the bottom. right then i knew – she had been fucked. my dick got as hard as it has ever been because i knew i was going to have the hardest night of fucking in my young life. i was a raging 23yo with stamina and a massive 7″ thick erection. 7″ and thick, i’m not small, but i knew if she had gotten fucked, it was by a guy with a larger tool.

    she took that teddy off, came to bed and i casually acted like i was waking up and asked “so?” and she told me she had been fucked twice. she walked in, immediately went to the “ladies room” and asked for toilet paper. when he came in, she was up on the sink counter with her legs spread. he fucked her there. the thought of that was pretty amazing. then they had a drink or two and he fucked her on his couch. that’s all the detail i got. so, i climbed on her, thrust my cock inside her and proceeded to fuck her as hard and as passionately as i could. now, the night was mine. i was going to fuck her as many times as i could and insist on getting every detail. she was not very forthcoming with the intimate details, and instead kept it all very high-level. i guess it was her way of having me ask for more – kind of a show of affection for her life, i don’t know. but i eventually got every single detail and i must’ve fucked her four times and until 3am or so. i dumped buckets of cum into her. she was completely full of cum and her pussy was incredible. it stayed incredible.

    the next morning i got up and used her lipstick and wrote “you are a whore” on the mirror. it took me a few days to get over the fact that she went thru with it, and eventually we started talking about it during sex. but suffice it to say, the best thing (for me) is to keep the fantasy a fantasy. when it happened, it was incredibly sexy and led to world-class sex, but the hurt wasn’t worth it.

    we divorced in ’92 a few years later – i don’t know if this night was the reason, but she started abusing alcohol pretty ridiculously around then and the marriage was just not going to continue. i met her when i was 17yo. i had had sex with three others before her, and i fucked them all like a rabbit. like i said, my dick is sizable, but i could not cum with anyone, but would just fuck trying to come. with her, the first time we fucked it was perfection. her pussy was the most exquisite thing ever – i came buckets in about two minutes. we were insatiable and fucked everywhere all the time.

    i remarried in ’96 to a woman who has an even better vagin. 5’6″, 115lbs 34C and a vagina that would make anyone cum. she is amazing. our sex life began three weeks after we first went out and holy crap! it wasn’t more than a few months before i started sharing my fantasy – “you know what i’d love”? “no – what would you love?” “i’d love to see you get fucked by a guy with a huge dick.” she loved hearing that. she would get so turned on. we’ve been married 21yrs and we talk thru this fantasy like once or twice a week and we fuck three or four times a week. she’s still so hot after the years and two children. we’d never go thru with the fantasy, because a) i learned my lesson b) she loves only me. but that doesn’t mean we don’t fuck like rabbits and as often as we can. what we do instead is, i have gotten her large “toys” and i use them on her when the time is right. certainly not all the time, and more like once every tenth time or so. now, that is about the hottest thing imaginable.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Your comment makes me really uncomfortable. You persuaded your first wife to fulfil your ultimate fantasy, then when you were upset about it afterwards you tried to hurt her and then blamed her for the breakdown of your relationship? Maybe it’s the way you tell this story, but your behaviour here makes me deeply uncomfortable. There is nothing wrong with having this fantasy, nor with struggling to deal with the fallout when you make it real (emotions can be very unpredictable, after all) but you seem to be either boasting about or ignorant of outright cruelty on your part. I hope that you can have a healthier relationship with your new wife as you explore this kink and recognise her needs within your relationship too.

  • Chuck the one-time cuck says:

    this lifestyle caused a break down. my psyche could not handle it. i thought i could, but couldn’t. personally, i’m uncomfortable with the story myself. the sex was amazing, but the fact we went thru with it was not a good idea. at its basis element; we’re animals and behaving like an animal in this instance was stupid (for me). it wasn’t that i persuaded her, but that the sex persuaded both of us. the perversion of our sex created by the hotwife fantasy caused the breakdown. i was to young to think it thru fully. and, being sexualized young by such erotica created an urge to fulfill the wildest fantasies. that fantasy also caused the most erotic sex i’d had in my life, up to that point. and the fantasy, still serves to create fantastic sex. some people are ok going thru with it, and it doesn’t affect them like it does people like me. you never know how you’re going to react to something such as this until it happens. she was fine with it and it broke my spirit.

    • Girl on the net says:

      I understand that, and as I say I really do appreciate that it can be difficult when fantasies cross over into real life – especially if you’re not prepared for the fallout, it can be intense. My worry here is not with your feelings but with your behaviour. You’re still talking about the fantasy as if it’s something that happened to you – an outside force beyond your control. But while fantasies and emotions can surprise us, we can control our behaviour. And it would be more reassuring if you had acknowledged in your story that your behaviour was not kind or OK.

  • Chuck the one-time cuck says:

    dear girl on the net,
    please – understand that:
    a) i didn’t write the story and pour over it for hours to ensure i covered all possible angles to satisfy any and all issues to arise.
    b) it happened a very very long time ago when i was an immature young man and at this point it is just nastalgic (for me).
    c) to answer your final point (my beavhior was not ok), i think the story speaks very clearly that the behaviour was not ok and i said clearly what lead to the fall-out.
    d) if you so vehemently disagree with the story, please delete it all.
    e) i posted this story in the manner i did (focused primarily on the hot sex) #1 because the title of this article is “Cuckolding – the least sexy word for one of the sexiest fetishes.”
    f) if the article was entitled “Cuckolding – the fetish that could lead to break-ups” i would have not focused on the hot sex, and instead focused on the problems it created.

    • Girl on the net says:

      I don’t disagree with your story, or want to delete it – it’s your experience, and it’s not for me to delete or edit it (unless it was libellous or what have you). I just wanted to raise those points because – as I’m sure you can understand – this blog isn’t just me talking to you. There are lots of people who may stumble across the comments section and be in similar situations and be looking for guidance or experience which can help them with their own stuff. While I don’t expect you to edit your comments and pore over them the way I would with a blog post, I do host this blog and so I think I have a responsibility to respond to comments where there might be something more to say, that might be helpful for other people who read them as well as potentially for the commenter themselves. It sounds like you’re quite annoyed that I picked you up on that point, but at the same time you do also seem to see why I did, because you mention that you don’t have time to pore over and edit things. So: I can’t see what’s in your head, I can only see what you’ve written on the page. And to me what you wrote on the page felt like it needed a response.

  • Chuck the one-time cuck says:

    Since you challenged me and said the story made you uncomfortable, over the last day I’ve thought an awful lot about what brought me to that point. This is what I’ve come up with, which is valid [for me] and perhaps others can glean some understanding from it, or perhaps not. First, having been sexualized in the modern-manner (’70s porn movies featuring the most alluring and beautiful people ever filmed performing sex acts – John Holmes (his penis was stupendous in the way he fed it to his lovers – watch autobiography of a flea when he takes Pierre’s wife), Marilyn Chambers, Jean Jennings (the entire movie of autobiography of a flea she is utterly stunning and amazing) – performing the most sensual/erotic scenes imaginable – this stuff was as illicit as could be – if you haven’t seen the movies, by all means, see them!). The mind of a 15yo boy was easily shaped by these incredible images. Coupled, at the time, with the extremely hardcore magazines of Oui, Penthouse, and Hustler, the material I subjected my young sexual mind to was simply titillating and utterly mind-blowing. I’m not complaining. I don’t feel like my innocence was stripped away.

    I don’t know your sexualization story, but I can guarantee there are millions of 40/50yo men out there that were influenced strongly as young teens in the exact same way – seeing the object of their desire getting rammed by massive cock, and loving it. The imagery of sex amongst beautiful people is powerful and the imagery created vast worlds of fantasy for me and I would lay back, close my eyes, masturbate and orgasm shooting ropes onto my headboard. Very strong… The worlds I created in my mind were elaborate and every bit as good as actual sex. As a 15/16yo, my day was controlled by my dick. It still is to some degree, but luckily the curse has been lifted somewhat ;-). Back then, however, I’d go to school and would have a full erection every 5-7 minutes. The bell rang to change classes and I’d have to sit in my desk until classmates would dissipate to the degree so I could be somewhat comfortable that no one would be around to notice my raging boner. I’d get a boner for no reason and at that age, it’d be straight up and above my belt line. I couldn’t focus on anything. Every girl was the object of my desire. That was so uncool. It’s a miracle I ever got thru school. Luckily, I am smart.

    Naturally, when I finally met a girl that was willing to oblige with somewhat equal sexuality and it all “clicked” I no longer needed to go to my room, close my eyes and have my dreams fulfilled by beating off. Here was this super hot vixen of a girl that was more than willing to fulfill my dreams and vice versa. For example – sit down for this one… We’d skip school (12th grade), go to her house (everyone was gone during the day), and she’d insist we lay on the couch together to “snuggle.” I’m laying on my back, and she’s nuzzled up to me with a leg over my lap. Within a moment, my pants would get unzipped, pushed down and she’d be stroking my cock while licking and whispering in my ear – talk about fantasy being fulfilled? Every time this happened, when I’d get ready to ejaculate I’d start to moan and she knew the queue. She’d get up and swallow every drop – every time. Electric! She became my fantasy – she did the things the girls on the porn videos didn’t do. That wasn’t it. It wouldn’t be more than 10 minutes and I was ready to go again. We’d fuck hard and given I had just ejaculated, I was able to hold out. It was marathon sex. You know what I’m talking about. Things that happen to beautiful people who are in shape and horny – that’s what was happening to us. I played hockey and baseball. I was also on the swim team. She was on the diving team. I’m 6’2″, and she was/is 5’10”. Those were amazing times for me growing up.

    I can say with certainty (for me) that taking it to the point of infidelity was wrong. It broke the bond. I’m willing to take responsibility and I did learn from the situation. I would never consider breaking what I have now, which is every bit as good and so much better. To me (for me), physical commitment to one partner coupled with the mental freedom and full expression of thought is bliss. My wife and I of 21yrs talk about the most erotic things imaginable and have had each other in every way possible. I lust for her every moment of every day. If you want to be a cuck, be careful ’cause it might suck.

    Peace out.
    Chuck the one-time cuck (not my real name)

  • Cuckold At Heart says:

    I absolutely loved this article!!! I was in a (for lack of better words) cuckold marriage for almost six years in which my wife (ex-wife now due to unrelated issues) fucked many, man men of all races. Although my reasons for liking it and wanting it are much simpler than many people “analyze” or “psychoanalyze.” Simply put, I just liked it. It was a turn on. It made me desire her and lust after her all that much more.

    I didn’t like it or get turned on by it because I wanted to be humiliated, or shamed, or for sperm competition. I wanted her to fuck other men simply because it was a turn on. As a side note…. I know many psychologists say that sperm competition is one of many main reasons as to why men like their wife or girlfriend to fuck other men. Quite frankly, that’s a stupid fucking reason. Just the thought of my sperm trying to “out swim” another man’s is a ridiculous notion and thought. To me, even the most educated, PhD holding psychologist can be the stupidest people in the world.

    Sometimes, sexual people do sexual things out of shear pleasure and satisfaction. That’s it. Plain and simple. And I am one of those men that liked her fucking other men because it was pleasurable and satisfying. No hidden desires. No hidden agendas. No suppressed feelings. No lack of self esteem. No lack of confidence. I JUST LIKED HER FUCKING OTHER MEN!! It was a turn on. A real lustful experience.

    And currently, I have a girlfriend that has fucked a few other men. And I hope she continues. She knows I like it. She knows it turns me on. And she knows I fuck her better because she does it. She also knows I love her more because she does it.

  • uncomfortable reader says:

    This article makes me really, really uncomfortable to read, in that you seem to enjoy your partner crying like that. I’ve never heard of a healthy cuckold relationship that left the cuck crying outside of sex over what was going on. Or, at the very end where you say “As long as I’m on the right side of it, of course.” That doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship to me at all, whatsoever. Are you sure you’re not just a sadist?

    • Girl on the net says:

      My partner enjoys making me cry sometimes too. It’s part of a dynamic we both enjoy exploring.

      • uncomfortable reader says:

        Maybe, but that’s you and your current partner. What about this guy you mention that you knew once upon a time? Maybe he told you he thought cucking was hot, but did he tell you he was okay with it being hot? This reads a lot more like that guy really, seriously needed some aftercare that you weren’t giving him.

        • Girl on the net says:

          Things I like right now are frequently inspired by things and people I have liked in the past. For the record, the guy in this is the same as the guy in this: https://www.girlonthenet.com/2015/05/10/crying-is-hot/ – he introduced me to this dynamic, and we explored it together, and I found it sexy. We played with this stuff because we liked it. It was a fun way to explore emotional stuff alongside sexy stuff, and much of the sexy stuff came from the emotion (and vice versa). It is an interesting and hot dynamic. If you don’t enjoy it like that, that is cool and I am not going to judge you or tell you you’re wrong, but it’s really bizarre and kind of creepy that you are willing to tell me exactly how I should have played with someone who you have never met and do not know. If these kinds of posts make you uncomfortable, do not read them.

  • Mnj says:

    its a kink that is growing very very FAST among couples.

    it has to be done properly and for people who say it is “cheating” you are way way off the mark!!
    it is a loving thing thing between a man and a women. ALL about LOVE & TRUST..and a lot of SPICE :)

    great post thanks
    Mnj
    owners of the exclusive https://cuckolding.club

  • Chris says:

    If I understand- it brings you sexual pleasure to cause mental torture to someone (even if he actually enjoys it)… your husband or boyfriend. I’m sorry but thats pretty f’d up if you ask me, you must be totally void of empathy and compassion to like this.

    “Hi darling I fucked a guy that had a huge dick because yours isnt worth bothering with” , “ok sweety”

    I personally compare it to under-age.. just wrong.

    • Girl on the net says:

      “Hi darling I fucked a guy that had a huge dick because yours isnt worth bothering with”

      ????????????

      Actually, it’s more like

      “Hi darling I fucked another guy because both you and I find the idea of that hot, and enjoying sexual pleasure together is one of the things we both fucking love”

      Honestly I think your comment says a lot more about your own insecurities than about anyone who enjoys this fetish.

  • Jav says:

    Thanks for this post, I have been interested in being a cuckold for many years now, been able to talk about it with some ex’s but they get turn off by the idea, they all say they can’t do that to me because I’m a really nice guy, currently single for that same reason, is very difficult to find someone that also wants or enjoys this fetish :(

  • Bitch2007 says:

    Great post by the way! I’m not currently in a sexual relationship due to health problems but my partner and I lived kind of in and out of this lifestyle for around 7 years without even knowing the terminology or that there was a scene or anything, so it was purely our thing. It was only later on in pure frustration that I discovered the terms “hotwife” and “cuckold” the latter of which is a horrible word, so why can’t we find a better one?
    Most of my fantasy’s are based around being dominated and revolve around the realisation that although my partner truly loves me she is unable to feel filled and satisfied by me and seeks the excitement and thrill of being with well endowed, attractive men which morphs and gets out of hand.
    I would love for us to be getting married while she is in a very passionate relationship with another man, to take ‘my wife’ to bed afterwards when another man has fucked her before, during and after the wedding would be mind blowing! Only coming to me when she is sufficiently satiated and splattered with spunk so that I am powerless to resist her body and made to taste a man’s cum off of her body before she sits on my face and suffocates me with her dirty slut, wet and unwashed cunt. “Eat my dirty cunt, BITCH!” She spits out…
    My wicked wife owns me, and while we honeymoon and I watch her depravity blossom into a dark fruit, I am finally confronted with a deeper fantasy, the tables are turned and I am tied and blindfolded naked on all fours while she orchestrates me sucking the cocks of several men while they take it in turns to slide their huge blacks cocks inside my arse hole and fuck me like a little hore as she watches laughing drunkenly in the arms of her muscular lover…. ahhhermmm!! And lots and lots of scenarios like this and related to my humiliation, dominance and degradation by her and for her (although obviously it seems to be all about me) haha
    Oh yes, I really, really would love for her to piss in my face and mouth too! And pee in her knickers, wearing them all day so that I can bury my face between her thighs at night, smell her piss soaked, fetid and hairy fanny through her dirty knickers, intoxicating myself with her smell before “Lick me you dirty bitch!” I want to be clean so that I can go out and fuck tonight!

  • Yammi says:

    When I was 5 years in our marriage, my wife asked for a divorce as she was violently love with a football player. That fellow came to me and demanded my divorce from her. I loved my wife too much and I sat down to have a detailed talk. She was adamant. We came to a contract that she could have her bull but no divorce. She wanted that her first child would be from that bull. I also agreed to that. The relationship went on for 3 years. She had a boy from the bull. And we have a girl. I was introduced as the father of the boy. I always hated the boy but my daughter and the boy have a wonderful relationship. I also told my wife that the boy was not going to inherit anything of my wealth and she agreed. The boy must have understood my cold behaviour and could have guessed his parentage. But as an intelligent guy he does not complain. Meanwhile the bull died of cancer some time ago. A letter came to my wife. It was written by the bull. The bull left a 3000 square feet flat and $ 200000 for the boy.

    • Girl on the net says:

      This doesn’t sound like cuckolding as a fun sexual fetish – this sounds really alarming. I wasn’t sure whether to let your comment through or not because it’s really disturbing – why would you agree to a particular situation and then take out your anger about that situation on a child? I guess it’s none of my business, but I hope that your children and family are doing OK, and that if you’re still struggling with this you can find someone to talk to. This isn’t cuckolding in the sense this blog post talks about, though, it’s something very different.

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