Woo! Start of the week! That means you get to throw all last week’s mistakes into the bin and be reborn as a better person. That’s what I like to think, at any rate. In ‘two things‘ this week we’re starting with the good stuff: a competition in which you can win a Doxy die cast, as well as £100 to spend on more amazing sexy things. Then we’ll move on to something that annoyed me: the McVities ‘girls’ night in’ advert.
The good: win a Doxy die cast + £100 voucher
Doxy is my favourite sex toy in the entire world. They’ve teamed up with two amazing porn performers to make a porn scene which features their toys: the Doxy die cast and the Doxy Don. It’s hot as fuck, and they’re amazing, and to be honest they had me at about thirty seconds in because I got to watch a dude playing with one of my favourite prostate toys and making the kind of faces that mean you can tell he enjoyed it.
Anyway. They’ve taken a still from the film and they’re running a caption competition, which I get to judge. Reply to this tweet to enter, and you could win a Doxy die cast of your very own (in whichever colour you choose), and a £100 voucher (or equivalent in your currency) to spend at any Doxy retailer. Want to join in? Of course you do. Give me fun captions to judge when the comp closes in a week.
You have to enter by replying to the tweet – don’t just comment here because it’s being run by Doxy so a comment here won’t count.
— DOXY (@Doxy) September 20, 2016
Full disclosure: Doxy are paying me to judge their comp, but I’d have posted this whether they paid me or not, so I’m not sure where the rule lies on sponsored/paid stuff with that. Either way. Better to say it: Doxy gave me some money so I don’t have to eat beans this week. Cheers Doxy.
The bad: McVities explains why women are rubbish
Get a load of this horseshit.
Why, it’s almost like McVities have had a focus group with a bunch of people who have never met women before, and simply guessed at what we might be like by watching late-90s rom-coms. They’ve then multiplied their assumptions by about ten, had a five-year-old write the script, and hired a few actors who are willing to plough through it regardless of how sexist it all is.
Once that was all done, consider this: a team of people sat in the editing suite and chopped it together. Executives and other people who should know what they are doing all approved it. Someone sent it to Buzzfeed, and paid to sponsor it. As recently as yesterday this video popped up as ‘sponsored’ on my FB page, even though thousands of comments beneath it pointed out that it was patronising, stereotyping arse-dribble. No one involved screamed ‘STOP. THIS IS APPALLING.’
Or, more realistically, quite a few people must have said ‘this is appalling’ at some stage in the process. It’s often fun to wonder how sexist marketing makes it out past so many human individuals who in theory have the power to say ‘STOP.’ But if my experiences of office life and creative ideas are even vaguely representative, a manager will have overruled any dissenters because they personally thought ‘patronising girls’ night in’ was a really good way to sell biscuits.
McVities, a word of advice: go find the emails that no doubt flew around the office regarding this project. Find anyone and everyone who thought it was a bad plan, and promote them. Immediately.