Bonus guest blog today! Sarah Beilfuss is one of the co-founders of Scarlet Ladies Talk, running regular events aimed at normalising the conversation around female sexuality. Last month other co-founder Jannette wrote a gorgeous post about learning to love her breasts, and this guest post tells a similar personal story about learning to enjoy your body and your sexuality. It’s awesome.

This blog is part of a sponsored series by Scarlet Ladies Talk, so if you like it please go and check out their website  and sign up for their newsletter. They run loads of really cool events, the next one of which, on 29th July, includes live sensual massage. They’ve also just launched a free ebook – the Scarlet Ladies Guide To Solo Sex, which collates tips from experts on different masturbation techniques. Or, as the Scarlet Ladies put it, “how to wank yourself into heaven.”

Meanwhile, enjoy this gorgeous guest blog.

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I like the way a guy’s dick twitches when I push something into him – like a butt plug. I like to watch that twitch as the plug slips inside – that quick pulse of his cock that tells me it’s settled neatly into the right place.

His face twitches too. A flicker of pain/lust/need/satisfaction – one or all, delete as appropriate.

And that’s why I want him to get fucked in the ass while he fucks me.

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Hands are beautiful. To my mind they can be one of the sexiest things about a person. The way they gesture to highlight playful flirtation, the skilled things they do like driving or playing Xbox. The ways you can use them to touch and pinch and smack and stroke… Mmm.

Alongside the sexiness of hands, I’m a big fan of the way in which things like watches can draw attention to sexy movements (like wearing a watch while wanking, for instance). So when Monica got in touch to explain how rings accentuate the hotness of hands, naturally I could not resist the opportunity to share in her deliciously hot thoughts about them…

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“It’s hot when two girls get off, but it doesn’t work the other way round.”

“Excuse me?”

“You know. Like women watching a guy play with another guy’s dick. It doesn’t have the same effect.” 

I’ve had this conversation too many times. Far too many times. There’s a longer blog to post another day about the fact that straight-guy sexuality is so tightly woven into our culture that often dudes struggle to get their heads round the fact that, you know, they can be objects of lust just as easily as they’re subjects. But I’ll bore you about that another day.

For now, in response to the person who said this to me, allow me to describe an interaction so hot it makes my toes clench, even just remembering it.

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Yesterday, Deborah Orr wrote in the Guardian about ‘creepy’ sex robots. She began with a statement from Noel Sharkey – a robotics professor at Sheffield Uni – who earlier in the week had terrified people by claiming that one day people might lose their virginities to robots. Shock! Horror! Misery! Woe! Another way to perpetuate the myth of virginity as a valuable jewel which people must save to give to someone special!

Deborah questioned this, which is good, but she then launched in to a lot of the same disappointing fearmongering about sex tech that I’ve seen before. Let’s have a look. And then a rant.

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