Why don’t humans ever roar during sex? You know, just letting out a proper, full-throated, guttural roar which shakes the very walls of the bedroom you happen to be fucking in. Luckily, although humans are incapable of doing this, the latest episode of Dynasties on the BBC has the next best thing: 22 seconds of full-throated, hot-blooded tiger sex. It’s the most erotic thing I have ever seen in my life.
One of the strange things about my current relationship – as opposed to any other I’ve been in – is that I’ve forgotten how to get rejected. I know, right? Poor me. Please crack out the smallest violin you own and play a concerto in ‘Woe is GOTN.’ Rejection – and specifically sexual rejection – is something I used to have a lot of practise in. I knew how to take a ‘no’, and greet it with a shrug and a cuddle. I knew how to take ‘seriously? Now? AGAIN?’ and absorb it into my thick, thick skin, so it couldn’t pierce through to the soft bit inside me that – whisper it – needed sex to feel loved.
Him: Do you know what was good?
Him: Last night, when I sat on the floor under the desk and you sat on the chair in front of it naked from the waist down. When you put your feet up on the edge of the desk and then let me eat your cunt for aaaaaages.
It’s that time of year again, in which I get to let my inner creepy goth out and write some Halloween erotica. Last year I did sex with zombies, the previous year it was a succubus (sort of), and this year – thanks to suggestions and ideas from some lovely people on Twitter – I’m tackling a creature from the deep. If you’d prefer to listen rather than read, it’s also available as audio – click ‘listen now’ above, or head to the audio porn page if you’d like to hear more sexy stories read aloud. I’m always a bit nervous and uncertain about writing fiction, but these Halloween erotica pieces are always a genuine pleasure to write, so I hope I can manage to give you a creepy shiver or two.
Content note: this story is written for Halloween, and is designed to be a tale of creepiness with a bit of sex thrown in. As a result it contains some themes that you might find disturbing: references to drowning, self-harm and suicidal ideation.