All Posts – Page 243

Double penetration with a strap-on and a cock

Spent ages trying to come up with a fun title for this, and I just kept coming back to the most descriptive one: double penetration with a strap-on and a cock.

Because

a) that’s exactly what happened and

b) it was one of the best things I have ever done. Ever.

I’d like to say that double penetration with a strap-on and a cock is a normal Saturday night in my house, but that would be downplaying the gravity and excitement of the situation. Last week, I finally managed to do something I’ve been wanting to do for years.

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Why won’t tall women date short men? A theory…

I’m 5′ 11”. In my life, I have slept with a fair few men, most of whom were the same height as, or taller than me. Am I horribly shallow? No, not really. But I can tell you that as a tall girl it’s genuinely quite difficult to find shorter guys who are actually willing to fuck me.

Of those who might be up for a shag, many have spent a long time making excruciatingly tedious comments about how massive I am, or listing ways in which I need to slightly adjust (take off heels, slouch a bit, sit down) in order to meet with their approval. That tends to put me off a bit, to be honest.

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In which he tells me a sexy story…

Everything that happens in this blog post is consensual. But it involves two people exploring consensual non-consent fantasies, so please be aware before you read. 

I love a good bedtime story. Ideally a story told in hushed whispers, with his lips pressed right up against my ear and his hand rummaging eagerly at my cunt.

It’s probably frustrating, when you’re getting hot and hard and ready, to have your partner pause for a break in proceedings to ask for a bedtime story. But there’s something about a sexy story that gets me wetter than a hand could. The plot, the fucking itself, the veiled implication that these are things he would do to me if he could…

Yeah. I like sexy stories.

Most of the time, bedtime stories take the form of memories or future plans.

“Remember when we…?”

“Have you ever wanted to..?”

And they’re great. But they’re different. I’m talking here about real bedtime stories – scripts he writes in his head, with the express purpose of turning me on.

Here’s one of my favourites.

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Two things: the Boyfriend Narrative and porn addiction

Two things to kickstart your week: a seriously interesting article on the way we talk about sexual health, and some church pastors who think they have a porn addiction.

Happy Monday…

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Weird sex dreams: what do they mean?

This blog post is going to contain some sexual references that are bizarre, offensive and downright troubling, including incest and bestiality. 

Point one: people who tell you in detail about their dreams are generally pretty boring.

Point two: because of this, people who tell you about their dreams are usually intensely apologetic about it. The conversation normally begins “I know it’s annoying to talk about dreams but…”

That ‘but’ is pretty important, because it usually means ‘but I want to get something off my chest/need you to make me feel better/am worried that I am horribly abnormal because of this odd thing that kicked off in my brain.’

So. While I have very low tolerance for people who tell me that last night they flew to a castle made of marshmallows and Eamonn Holmes gave them a spoon with which to eat it, when people want to tell me their weird sex dreams, I am usually all ears. Why? Because I have weird sex dreams too.

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