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Porn: not all of it is for you
As the sun will rise every morning, so each day an internet commenter will decide that something new is The Worst Thing To Ever Have Happened.
I’m not prone to slagging off commenters – you who join in below the line, adding critique, debate, praise and hilarious jokes about this one time you fell off the bed while fucking – you are a valuable and incredible part of the internet. Sniffy bloggers like me don’t have a monopoly on opinions, and frequently the contribution of thoughtful, awesome people adds loads to a topic, or makes me snort coffee out of my nose when they drop a particularly hilarious pun. Comments are incredibly valuable: I’d be a liar if I told you differently.
But there is one kind of commenter who can fuck utterly off. And it’s someone I had only made passing acquaintance with until I started working for hot porn site Dreams of Spanking. It’s this person:
“Eww. Why on earth would you post two men going at it?”
“Sorry, but this just isn’t my thing AT ALL.”
“What the hell is THAT?”
Fishnets and buttsex and all the right noises
Fishnet tights.
I know, they’re obvious. They’re easy. They’re prone to laddering. But they’re hot. And I can’t wear fishnets to this day without thinking about urgent, spit-lubed buttsex. Here’s why.
Blogger removes all that icky adult content
UPDATED 25th Feb – jump to why the Reddit image cull is not the same.
UPDATED 27th Feb – well, what do you know? Google’s reversed the decision and has now said it won’t delete adult blogs. However, given that Google could change its mind at any time, and given that it has a long history of trying to rub out anything sexy, I’d still be really wary if I were you, and much of what I’ve said below still stands. Beware omnipotent companies with the power to delete chunks of the internet.
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Another day, another pathetic attempt to remove bums from the internet. If you’re a sex blogger and you’re hosted on Blogger (so if your url is DirtySexBlogName.blogspot.com or .co.uk or whatever) you need to either scrub your blog shiny-clean and start focusing on tulips or chilli recipes or something, or you need to migrate it to another site. Best to go self-hosted, although beware your host: I once had a heart-stopping 24 hours during which Bluehost decided that my site was too disgusting for human consumption and shut the whole thing down.
Advice, info, and all that stuff on the Blogger issue can be found over on Write Sex Right.
I know loads of people are still using Blogger for their sex blogs, and others are using WordPress. I’d advise you to get off both of these if you want to make sure you’re safe, and go self-hosted. Even if you don’t post pictures. Even if you think your blog is relatively tame compared to others. Even if you don’t run ads or use affiliate links or have much traffic: move it or lose it.
Giving up bad sex habits
“What’s that?”
“A spreadsheet of my best wanking times.”
He didn’t even ask why. He just laughed, rolled his eyes, and then wandered into the kitchen to make coffee. But, for the record, I am compiling a spreadsheet of my wanking times, so that I can eventually graph the results and post a blog about it. Why?
Win a ticket to Eroticon 2015 and help me write my talk
Forgive the meta-blog, this is one for other sex writers and bloggers, so if you’re just here for the filth or the ranting, check out a random archive post or two and normal service will resume on Sunday.
When I first started sex blogging, I didn’t really think it’d be a big thing. I thought I’d write some half-baked opinions and spit out some of the sexy stories that I was itching to tell people, and then one day I’d shrug my shoulders and just… well… stop. Then some people started reading it. They were joined by more people, and in the brief periods of time between writing a blog and worrying that it wasn’t any good, I managed to start doing things like writing articles for other websites, and a book, and other stuff.
Then I went to a conference in which loads of people gave me advice on how to be better, and it was amazing. It basically answered a whole bunch of questions I had about sex blogging, like ‘how do you get people to pay you to write about hot things on the internet?’ and ‘how do I pitch articles to people who have never heard of me before?’ To be honest, the only question that remained unanswered was ‘how much time do you spend masturbating?’