When I first read this story – an exquisite fantasy written by Jaimie of Jaimie’s Erotica – my first thought was ‘holy shit, I have seen videos like this and they made my cunt flood too!’. My second thought was ‘why do we not write more erotica with a heavy focus on precum?’. In this fabulous story, Jaimie and her girlfriend experiment with a little kinky DIY so they can live out their dreams of teasing a guy’s dick through a hole they’ve cut in a second-hand kitchen table. It’s exactly as hot as that sounds, with an additional stunning emphasis on how horny it is to get to play, taste and paint each other with eager little droplets of precum. Unngh. Check out Jaimie’s blog at the link above, read her previous guest blog The Chatelaine (a beautifully atmospheric Halloween-themed piece), follow her on Mastodon or BlueSky, and keep an ear out for some of her incredible work appearing on the audio porn project this year too!

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It’s late, and I’m tired. So tired, in fact, that I’ve just slept through the last twenty minutes of the film we were meant to be watching. You can’t blame me: it’s not often I get to snuggle up on a sofabed with my head in somebody’s lap, sinking into the duvet and enjoying the gentle, rhythmic stroke of their hand on my bottom and thighs. It is blissful. Beautiful. Like stepping into a shower that’s set to the perfect temperature, or hugging a loved one when you meet them off the train. I am safe, cosy, happy. This scene is tranquil as fuck, so you can’t blame me for falling asleep. I am also a horny bitch, though, so I hope you can also understand what happens next.

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I woke up last Thursday with the loveliest, softest feeling: like I’d just had a truly sexy dream. It was hyper-realistic, and that realism lingered in my mind as I opened my eyes. Snuggling down beneath the duvet in a winter-warm bed, I ran hands over my body and allowed the details to return to me piece by piece.

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This gorgeous ode to bareback is written and read by Robyn of RobynEatsEverything. 

The birdsong outside woke me up before the feel of his hard dick pressing against my back. I was briefly confused; why was there a bird calling outside in the dead of night? I lifted my head briefly to check and yes, it was still dark. The only source of light was seeping from underneath the bathroom door, the light we’d forgotten to turn off hours earlier, before we both fell into bed and each other.

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If you’d rather hear this one read aloud, join my Patreon (at any tier) and go to this update: it starts at 14:45. If you want to catch up with the trilogy (though it’s not necessary to read them in order), here’s part 1 (cunt) and part 2 (ass). This is part 3 (mouth), and it’s my favourite. 

Shagging new people isn’t just a question of teaching them how I like to be touched, or which words make me squirm with desire. Sometimes I find myself having to school men on the basics, like ‘it’s not shameful if you can’t get hard’ or ‘you’re allowed to take some time to get comfortable before I start sucking your dick’. New guys often behave like sex is this thing which must be done correctly, immediately, or they’ll somehow lose points. This isn’t a criticism, my dudes, it’s understandable that some of you have taken this message from society, because society’s been shrieking bullshit at you for ages, telling you that this is how sex works. It even uses words like ‘performance’ when trying to sell you boner pills, as if fucking is a production you’re putting on, and I’m just the audience who will sit there and applaud.

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