This morning I received a strongly worded letter from the Sex Blogger’s Association, informing me that as I have not yet written any custom content for Masturbation Month, they will soon be removing my Fuckblogger badge and ripping up my membership card. The only way out of this is to write some sauce that explicitly references ‘Masturbation Month.’ So here goes: 10 wank fantasies that you can steal/tweak/edit and enjoy at your leisure.

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This week’s guest blogger is writing about one of my favourite things in the world: wanking. And not just any wanking – super-hot masturbation while she watches herself in the mirror. It’s the perfect piece to put up during Masturbation Month, and is so hot that it’s made me feel like I want to treat myself to a seriously awesome wank like this too. Please welcome the very talented @ZebraRoseSub!

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In case you hadn’t seen it from literally every sex toy company you follow on social media (what do you mean you don’t follow sex toy companies on social media? Go follow some of my sponsor companies, immediately!) May is Masturbation Month. For wankers like me, that means it’s the same as any other month, only we have to write content to hit the specific keyword ‘Masturbation Month’ or we’ll get beaten in Google searches by terrible magazine articles that offer wanking tips you already knew. ANYWAY. In my quest for Masturbation Month material, I thought I’d write you a list of some of my favourite kinds of wank.

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