Tag Archives: communication

Guest blog: What is subdrop? And how do you tackle it?
A reader got in touch recently to ask if I’d written about subdrop before, and frankly I could always do with more of this because I love the excuse to pick up new topics. On this topic, though, I don’t have much experience: I’m out of practice with kink play, and I think even when I used to do it regularly I wasn’t hugely affected by subdrop. Luckily for me, @ht_honey – whose fabulous blog can be fond here at Happy Come Lucky – was kind enough to share her experience of what subdrop is, as well as some fun and playful strategies on how to tackle it when it rears its head after a play scene.

In the bank/accidental ghosting: how often should you message?
If you are seeing someone on a casual basis, or you’ve agreed that you’re going to date/shag them but haven’t quite done the logistics for meeting up, how often do you message them? Are you checking in regularly to see how they’re doing, or do you consider them ‘in the bank’ and therefore probably not in need of regular contact until it comes time to meet up? What is the difference between being casual about checking in and accidentally ghosting someone?

OK Cupid is shit now
One of the things I’m finding hilarious about dating again, eleven years after the last time I was single, is that no matter how compatible or otherwise my date and I might be, there is one fact on which we always agree: OK Cupid is shit now. This isn’t a problem with an obvious, easy solution, I just think that when you realise something truly good is gone, it’s important to allow yourself time and space to mourn. OK Cupid sucks horrible arse these days, and I know I’m late to this revelation but I’m super fucking sad about it, and I wanted to have a little rant.

Sometimes I like to suck cock as self-care
When I’m feeling shitty, I like to suck cock. One of the most frustrating things for me about not having a live-in partner any more (if you discount the fact that, you know, I miss him terribly) is that there’s no easy-access dick to suck when I’m feeling unloveable and down.

In which I explain Final Fantasy and also something about men
The thing you need to know about men – perhaps not ALL men, but nearly all the men that I’ve ever had the pleasure of fucking into a sticky paste – is that they love explaining things. If you happen to be a horny, slutty woman who wants to get it on with a man, in my opinion the best way to achieve that is to find a topic that he has expertise on, or a nerdy fascination with, and ask him to explain it to you. Today’s blog begins on my living-room floor: this dude and I are sitting cross-legged eating Doritos and vaping giggly weed while he explains to me the plot of Final Fantasy.