It’s been a while since I posted a ‘two things’, so in case you’ve forgotten – ‘two things’ is a weekly post highlighting one good thing and one bad thing in the world of sex. Today in the ‘bad’ column – a reddit thread in which men are invited to have opinions on how women should behave. And ‘good’ – a sexy storytelling event in London called Smut Slam, which you should go to if you get the chance. If you read to the end there’s also a bonus competition to win an Eroticon ticket…
Woo! Start of the week! That means you get to throw all last week’s mistakes into the bin and be reborn as a better person. That’s what I like to think, at any rate. In ‘two things‘ this week we’re starting with the good stuff: a competition in which you can win a Doxy die cast, as well as £100 to spend on more amazing sexy things. Then we’ll move on to something that annoyed me: the McVities ‘girls’ night in’ advert.
…and the answers made me weep tears of joy. A couple of weeks ago, the lovely people at Godemiche (who make an incredible range of cool dildos) gave me a handmade, custom dildo to give away. To enter, all people had to do was complete the sentence:
‘If I were a dildo scientist, I’d make…’
We had some hilarious, beautiful and ingenious answers. Below is a selection of highlights, as well as the five runners-up. Please vote for your favourite, and the person with the most votes at midnight on Monday 1st August will receive the gorgeous custom dildo pictured above.
At this year’s Eroticon, there was a table covered in what I can only describe as a rainbow of dildos. In a huge variety of colours, with gorgeous designs and occasionally beautiful things actually encased in the silicone. The company, Godemiche, is run by Adam and Monika, who are not only geniuses but they’re super-passionate about dildo-making.
I squealed and marvelled at their amazing creations, then eventually asked if it was possible to make a dildo with my logo in it, because I am a professional blogger now, so I have to consider my #brand. They are dildo scientists, so the answer was ‘of course’, and a couple of weeks later I’m the proud owner of a super-cool handmade custom dildo. And you can win it, because I am nice like that and I like running weird competitions. See below to find out how it could be yours…
Remember a couple of weeks ago I thought it would be a great idea to get people to ring me and make sex noises down the phone, in order to win some cool sex toys? Well, I was right – it was an AWESOME idea, because I can now reveal the entries, and they’re brilliant. I challenge you to listen to the following clips and not spend at least a minute grinning in delight. (more…)