A friend of mine recently asked, as I was telling her how lovely a particular guy was, how I went about trying to avoid ‘catching feelings’ for the men that I spend time with. There are two answers to this question: the cunty one and the nice one. Both are true.

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Here are a couple of dates when I’m free – sorry for being such a forward-planning diary twat it’s just that I’m very busy and I’d really like to see you so it’s better if we book it a long way in advance. Let me know if either of these works for you. No worries if not!

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This gorgeous fuckbuddy blowjob story is written and read by EuphemiseThis, and it originally appeared on her website. 

Everyone needs that kind of friend. You know the one. A person who you can completely relax around, who you never need to impress or show off to, and who appreciates that humans are complex imperfect beings. Ideally, a friend who also finds you incredibly hot. This is the friend who you can watch cheesy tv shows with, share snacks and talk about bullshit, but then gleefully and hungrily jump each other’s bones. The sort of person who is enthusiastic whether the suggested activity involves takeaway, Netflix, or sex toys.

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This erotic fiction in which a guy enlists a stunt cock to help him teach another friend some BJ tricks is written and read by Euphemise This. 

Danya was excited to be back at uni for her final year, even though she knew that there probably wouldn’t be as much time for extra-curricular activities if she wanted to get a first. After unpacking, she headed to the kitchen to make herself a coffee but couldn’t face her housemates’ poor taste in instant so messaged Nate to see if he fancied meeting at Starbucks for a pumpkin spiced latte and a summer’s worth of gossip.

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No one ever tells me to my face that I’m greedy, but I am. Right now I trip through life with only a vague idea of what I want, but a raging certainty that I definitely need more of it. More. More drinks, more nights out, more catch-ups with friends I’ve not seen since Covid. More joy, more lust, more playfulness. More sex. More of those evenings which start with a pint and end up with you all tumbling into someone’s flat so you can welcome the dawn together with burgeoning hangovers and the sparkle of brand new friendships. More threesomes that make me feel like it’s my birthday. And because this is a post about the Godemiche Morpheus, inevitably I’m greedy for far more wanking too.

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