Before I begin, allow me a minute to put off 50% of you: this is not erotic fiction about what to do on your wedding night. It’s not a post about a romantic fuck at the end of your special day, or how to arouse your partner on the wedding night even though you’ve been together five years and you’re bored of the sight of their bollocks by now. If that’s what you’re after, then please pick up your warm white wine and move on to another buffet: this wedding night fuck is dirty.

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I think about it all the time: fucking strangers. My journeys into town, out of town, down to the shops to pick up milk: they’re all peppered with deeply personalised erotic fiction – flash-frame fucks starring people I pass on the way.

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Two things! I have been away all weekend, at the incredible EroticonLive. I’ll do a proper write up at some point, because I have a million thoughts and lovely things to say about the amazing sessions I went to. But in the meantime here are two links to things that you need to read: one sexy and shiver-inducing, and the other practical and wise.

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You might have noticed that I’ve been a bit lax on guest blogs for the last few months. Time and money have conspired to mean I haven’t been able to publish any. But now they’re back, and this first one – on holiday sex – by AB is going live because two things about it appealed to me.

Firstly, it’s a lovely holiday sex story, and not only do I love sex but I am also on holiday next week (OK, at Eroticon), so I can tie in the guest blog with a note that if I might not be super responsive over the next week or two.

Secondly, because when AB sent it to me, they said they’ve never written anything like this before, and I am a total sucker for any and all first times. Enjoy.

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“Let’s get some dick in you.”

There are two ways I can tell this story. If you’ve not read the sexy version then pop over and read that before you look at this one – I suspect it won’t have quite the same effect if you read them the other way around. I’ve been wanting to do this ‘two versions’ thing for a while, because it’s as honest an answer as I can find to a very frequently asked question: is what you write true?

It is. But storytelling, like sex, is often about the angle.

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