It’s important to me that you know this: I don’t publish sexy blog stories about people without their permission. That hasn’t always been the case – when I first started blogging I wrote about people who were so far in my past that I couldn’t have popped back up in their lives to get their OK, so I just fudged a lot of details and shot for anonymity. These days, everyone I’ve slept with recently knows that I’m girl on the net, which handily bypasses some of the more awkward conversations I might have to have with a stranger, and also means there’s no excuse to not ask before I turn our fuckstories into #content. So: sex writing and consent. Do people approve their blog posts? And if so, how does that work?

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I’m a big fan of masturbation sheaths – the squishy, textured, beautiful toys that you can use to add extra sensation to a dick-focused wank. I’ve written a lot about them here in the past, including a piece about one of the very best: the Tenga Flip Hole Zero EV (crap name, brilliant toy). I’ve also had guest writers extol the virtues of Tenga here too, most notably in this piece by Luke about the standard Tenga Flip Hole. This week’s post is a lot more personal, though, and I’m really honoured that today’s anonymous guest has chosen to share his story here. If you’re interested in trying out these kinds of toys, I hope his experience can give you a nudge in the direction of prioritising your pleasure: he’s written a beautiful love letter to Tenga.

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It’s been a while since the genius Jenby (aka @JenetalTorture) guest blogged for me, but if you’re familiar with her incredible past work (Pun-tastic pony play, anyone? Bimbofication? Squirting? Read the lot, treat yourself!) you will understand why, when her pitch email popped up in my inbox, I positively squeaked with glee. All her work is clever, funny, horny, and kinky-as-fuck, and frankly if I had been asked which writer I thought most likely to have had intense fun with a surveillance kink, her name would be top of the list. Got yourself a smart home? Know that it can be used to absolutely fuck with you…

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A selection of text messages I sent a while ago to spread some important news (I got laid).

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For libel reasons, I’m gonna front-load the intro here by pointing out that this week’s guest blogger, Sheebaby, did not have sex with actual Lewis Hamilton. But sometimes you bond with someone over a hobby or shared interest – in this case Formula One – and in Sheebaby’s case that bond led to some seriously hot online sex…

Content note: this post contains brief use of the term ‘daddy’ as an honorific. 

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