Category Archives: Unsolicited advice

NSFW Christmas gifts to buy for people you’re shagging

It’s that time of year again! You know the one, where you run around shopping centres or scroll listlessly through Amazon hoping inspiration might strike. If you’re a bit like me, you’ll be a very last-minute shopper. If you’re a lot like me, you’ll be thinking ‘shit, I have to get my other half something really good because last year he got me a selection of thoughtful treats and I just panic-bought some Lego Technic.’ Fear not. If you’re shopping for someone you’re boning, I’ve compiled a selection of some of my sex product highlights from 2018: NSFW Christmas gifts that come with my personal seal of lust.

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Cuddles as a love language: the closest I’ve come to a love ‘cheat code’

When my partner is sad, he wilts like a plant. I can sometimes tell he’s sad, despite him putting in his best efforts to try and make me think he’s fine, and for a long time I struggled with knowing how to cheer him up. The kind words and reassurances and ‘I love you’s that usually work on me have very little effect on him. But I think I’ve cracked it now – the closest I can come to a ‘cheat code’ for love. His ‘love language’: cuddles.

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Men in panties: how to wear my knickers (and how not to)

“I want to wear your knickers,” he tells me, and I’m instantly turned on – I love it when guys wear my knickers. I’m running simulations in my head: what he’ll look like in my knickers, and which pair might best show off his cock. But then he hits me with the next part… “and I want you to treat me like a silly little slut.”

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Cam: Black Mirror meets Chaturbate

Those who’ve been reading for a while might know I’m a fan of all things sex tech. From sex robots to customisable toys to sex tech hackathons, although I’m no tech expert I will happily lay claim to the title ‘enthusiastic amateur.’ And one of the things I have longed for, for ages, is a Black-Mirror-style exploration of the ways in which tech is seeping into our sex lives. Recently someone sent me a screener link for an awesome film that does exactly that, and it’s fucking exceptional. Let me tell you a little bit about Cam.

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Support trans people: respond to the GRA consultation

As a cisgender person, it’s hard to talk about trans rights in the UK without sounding either like a patronising arse (of course trans people should be able to access their rights! Don’t you realise trans people are people too?) or like I’m fishing for some kind of medal (of course trans people should be able to access their rights! Where’s my cookie?). As a result, I end up doing a weird fudge where I retweet links to things like the GRA consultation without ever writing about it in depth, because all the words I bash out onto the page seem like arsery or medal-fishing. But there are only a few days left to fill out the GRA consultation, and this is one of those rare opportunities where you get to spend a little bit of time making a tangible difference to something important, so here goes.

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