Men in panties: how to wear my knickers (and how not to)

Image by the brilliant Stuart F Taylor

“I want to wear your knickers,” he tells me, and I’m instantly turned on – I love it when guys wear my knickers. I’m running simulations in my head: what he’ll look like in my knickers, and which pair might best show off his cock. But then he hits me with the next part… “and I want you to treat me like a silly little slut.”

I love it when men wear my knickers. There have been a few guys over the years who have enjoyed rummaging around in my knicker drawer and picking a pair that they feel comfortable in: a quality pair of pants that sit right in that sweet-spot of joy right on the line between silky comfort and tight-enough-to-cuddle-their-cock.

The hottest time a guy has worn my knickers was when I wasn’t even there. I left a pair at his house, shortly after we started dating, and he – knowing me – thought it’d be fun to do a photoshoot.

I can still remember those images: the erection trapped against his body by tight purple cotton. There was light-blue trimming around the edges of the knickers, which framed the whole package perfectly. He showed me a photo of his precome leaking through the front of the fabric, and I was transfixed by the whole ensemble – just above the wet patch was a tiny blue ribbon, tied in a bow.


But hot isn’t always the way it goes down, because where there are my knickers, women’s knickers, there are also sometimes uncomfortable conversations.

Do you want to wear my knickers because women are silly sluts?

When I was younger, I used to be in a drama group. We played a game where we’d have to improvise scenes, then we’d be given playing cards and told to act out that scene again, but with the statuses that matched our cards. So the person with a three would play a very low-status character, the person with a Jack would assume much more power and authority. It was interesting, to see the same scenarios but with different status characters, and to watch a previously-high-status person suddenly draw a two and immediately shrink – in stature, in volume, and in power.

Similar things have happened occasionally when men have worn my knickers. I watch them crumple from ‘guy I really fancy, who is super-hot’ to ‘obsequious parody of what he thinks a woman should be.’ He’ll lower his eyes and bat his lashes the second he starts wearing silk, not just because that’s what he wants in the moment, but because that’s how he thinks that women are.

It’s not just “I want to be powerless” which is deeply hot if done consensually. It feels more to me like he’s saying “I want to feel silly, and thus deserve to be powerless, because I wouldn’t know what to do if I had that power anyway.”

It makes me uncomfortable, because it makes me wonder: is that what you think of me? I’m submissive, and so I wouldn’t blame any guy for trying to inhabit the role of ‘me’ and becoming a bit more subby. And if you’re role-playing a slut like me then sluttiness is surely part of the deal. But neither my sluttiness nor my submissiveness fully covers the abject obsequiousness that some guys exude when they’re pretending to be me. The ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ and ‘spank me harders’ are fine, but it’s the ‘tell me what to do’s and the doe-eyed pretence at silliness that get to me.

Is this how you see me, wearer of lace knickers?

Do you want to wear my knickers because I’m a slut?

It would be odd for me not to highlight that the vast majority of my sexual experience – and all of my dudes-wearing-my-knickers experience – has been done with cisgender guys, and I’m sure that’s a factor in how I feel about it. What’s more, I’ve deliberately kept this post really personal – it’s about the things I like and dislike, rather than an analysis of the reasons why people – in general – like stuff. I know that there are plenty of people who engage in this kind of role play and find it intensely arousing, and perhaps within the dynamic of your relationship, you’re able to navigate some of the things I mention above without discomfort or worry. If you can, well done to you.

But for me men wearing my knickers is quite a sensitive thing. I need them to be really careful of the atmosphere they’re conjuring, and the way in which their play might reflect on how they see me.

That doesn’t mean they can’t wear my knickers, it just means I’m going to be much more turned on by someone wearing my knickers because they like the feel of them against their skin, or because they enjoy the way the lace hugs tightly against their cock and balls. Someone who wants to wear them so he can strut around in front of me looking amazing, rather than cower at my feet pretending to be someone I don’t recognise. Swaggering around in my knickers, understanding why they are sexy on him, rather than turning himself into a parody of girlishness itself.

The guy who wore my purple knickers wore them because he had been sniffing them, enjoying the smell of my cunt on his face while he wanked, and wondered if he’d also enjoy the sensation of wearing them himself. He wore them because he thought they’d feel fucking great on his cock, and he knew I’d appreciate a photo of him grabbing his erection through the fabric. He wore them because he knew that the cut of my knickers would do interesting things to the sight of his muscular thighs and furry stomach, and perhaps also enhance the look of his arse.

He wore my knickers because they belonged to me – not ‘me’ a parody of womanhood, but ‘me’ a horny pervert who loves the sight of a rock solid boner. The ‘me’ who can’t resist a photo of a spunk stain spreading neatly through the cotton of my knickers. The ‘me’ who accidentally left my knickers at his house, and deliberately encouraged him to try them. It wasn’t about what he thought I expected – or what society expects of those who wear lace knickers.

It was about me, and about him. And about what we found hot.

This post is written for the Kink of the Week topic ‘men in panties’ – click the badge below to read all the other entries! You can also click here to see other kink of the week stuff I’ve written. 

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  • Jul says:

    Thank you and spot on. A man in lace undergarments is subversive and fun; a man mincing around in a poor parody of a drag queen is insulting and utterly unarousing. (Which is not to say that drag queens aren’t sexy and subversive and fun, because damn, are they ever.) I’ve been lucky enough not to have that experience, so the closing of your first paragraph, “and I want you to treat me like a silly little slut,” gave me pause because hey, I love that, until I registered the word “silly.” Ugh.

    I started dressing boys in my (outer) clothing when I was nine, and it seems to have stuck. Men in their own women’s clothing are also thrilling…I had a boyfriend surprise me in a slinky black shirt and miniskirt, lace-topped stockings, and a totally unexpected and glorious blue g-string contraption. He told me that he’d spent a long time deciding which one to order, which led to years of fantasizing about him, sitting in front of a computer and scrolling through the pages of, imagining how each item would feel when it rubbed against his cock, whether he wanted the visual tease of full back coverage or the personal tease of a thong, probably hard, maybe even dripping a little. Christ.

    In re: your final tag, I only have one problem with squeezing men into boy shorts, and it’s the word “panties.” I hate it, it’s a little girl word and feels creepy and pedophilic when applied to adults. Uncomfortable memories of being very young and not understanding why my doctor wanted to “take a peek in [my] panties,” maybe? We don’t say “knickers” in the US, which leaves us with “underwear” and “underpants,” both of which are inoffensive but not remotely hot. Your grandmother buys you socks and underwear for Christmas. Unless Grandma has Alzheimer’s, has lost all inhibitions, and buys you stockings and bits of satin for Christmas. So what the hell are we supposed to call them when we’re nipping someone’s dick through the fabric? “Mmmm, I love the way you look in my undergarments.” Yeah, no. Do you have any brilliant suggestions for this? I feel like you might have enough reach on the internet to create a new slang term, like Dan Savage with “Santorum” and “monogamish.” Maybe “precome fishing nets,” or “silkies,” or “wangwear”? Oof. Terrible. My little slut in [the garments you find in the top drawer of my dresser, and I don’t mean socks] feels the same way, thank god, so I don’t have to fear him killing my boner with the P word, but it would still be nice to have a good word for them.

    • Golden Hare says:

      Wouldn’t trying to get knickers adopted in the US be more fruitful than trying to invent a whole new word?

      • Girl on the net says:

        Seconding this by Golden Hare! If you like the word ‘knickers’, totally try to adopt it and see if you can spread the word a little =) I personally switch between ‘arse’ and ‘ass’ because I find the american ‘ass’ much hotter in certain contexts (though I have been given some stick by Brits for doing it occasionally, I’m sticking to it!). The other thing I’d suggest is maybe using the specific term for each item as sometimes the specific words can be much hotter than the general. i.e. ‘how about you go wear that blue silk thong I got you?’ or ‘maybe tonight you’d like to wear the tight frilly shorts?’ or ‘how about some french knickers?’ I think there’s something quite lovely about sexy stuff that’s really specific, because it tells the other person that you’re thinking about them in intense, sexy detail. I think ‘silkies’ is OK, though. Maybe ‘lacies’ as well? I guess it’s going to depend a lot on individual accents, and how words sound when they come out of your mouth – ‘ass’ to me always makes sense when I write it down, but as a Brit sometimes I chicken out when I’m saying a sentence out loud and I default to ‘arse’ just in case I sound like a pretentious twat who is trying to be American.

        Additionally: OH MY GOD that story about your BF who surprised you in a miniskirt is SO HOT. Thank you for sharing <3

  • Phillip says:

    Inspired! Truly inspired from the illustration by The Brilliant Mr. Taylor to your long form prose that continues to amuse right through the final period.


    • Phillip says:

      I just remembered a maybe suppressed memory of a big surprise I received on Halloween long ago. I always liked a long slip like Mrs. Robinson wore. I was very young and I seldom saw a woman or a girl in a slip, but I really liked it when I did. For Halloween I was expected to wear a costume which I really hated doing. I am sure I still do. My wife (Girlfriend then) suggested I go to the party dressed ‘as her’. She had a long slip and I didn’t have a clue what I was ‘getting into’. I dropped the slip over my head and in a millisecond or less I realized that it was magic. I got it off as fast as I could. In retrospect I should have left it on. My wife laughed until she almost wet her pants. I guess it was a Kink I didn’t know about. It was intense!

  • Lola says:

    I love seeing guys in my panties! Well done!

  • May More says:

    I have written about it before – how hot i find a guy in panties but, as u say, it has got to be done right. My man dressed in them once for me and was all man – and looked so hot – his cock contained within my skimpy lace – then he spanked me – that was how I want a guy to wear my knickers ;-) x

  • SpaceCaptainSmith says:

    “I watch them crumple from ‘guy I really fancy, who is super-hot’ to ‘obsequious parody of what he thinks a woman should be.’”

    While I haven’t ever worn a partner’s knickers, I felt sensitive to that line. As a guy who’s usually submissive and also enjoys crossdressing, that ‘obsequious parody’ of womanhood is something I’ve tried very hard to avoid…

    For me though, when I wear feminine clothing, I’m not playing a part or pretending to be something else. I’m not any more submissive than I am in male clothes, sometimes less so! So if I do come across as a ‘silly slut’, I hope people realise that’s not because I think ‘women are silly sluts’, but because that’s who I am. :)

    • Girl on the net says:

      “if I do come across as a ‘silly slut’, I hope people realise that’s not because I think ‘women are silly sluts’, but because that’s who I am” Excellently put, I reckon! I struggled a lot with this post as I couldn’t find a great way to sum it up, but yeah I think the whole ‘this is me and this is how *I* want to do this’ is much hotter than ‘this is what I expect of people who wear knickers.’

  • Bee says:

    I’m with you, if my guy was into wearing panties (sorry, my Nan wore knickers so I can’t get in board with them being sexy) then I’d want him to just be the same him. No changing his mannerisms and definitely not being a silly slut.

  • Molly says:

    Yes, yes and yes, he has to still be masculine for me to find it hot. I totally get that works for some but for me it is about him weaing the panties because they are mine and they look sexy on him because of that fact


  • Jason says:

    I’d love to wear a used pair your dirty panties.

  • TheMuppet says:

    Hey, just discovered this blog, and it’s the perfect place to share my new favourite thing; I’m a straight, cisgender guy and I’ve bought three pairs of sexy knickers. And they’re just the best fucking thing to wear when I wank, I just feel sexy you know?!

  • Del says:

    I love wearing women’s panties, been doing it for over 20 years, silk are my favourite, can get nice ones that fit well over my balls, wear them under jeans when I go out and get a little pre cum when on as they feel so soft and sensuous. Can’t stand up straight away tho, as they give me such a hard on. ;-)

  • Nimph says:

    Wow I discovered this blog a couple of days ago and I’m hooked! G’day from downunder!

    So I’m in my 40’s, a straight male…. I’ve been wearing knickers for years! I love how they make me feel… sexy… powerful and definitely naughty!

    I actually wear them under suit with lace top stay ups as a secret confidence booster when giving business presentations standing in front of a room.

    I do love watching people catch that I’m wearing sheer ‘socks’ and maybe they’re wondering just how far up my legs they go?! 😉

  • Blacknickerslover says:

    Mmmmmmmm, I LOVE all of this. I am always in black knickers.

  • Steve Jones says:

    I’m a married man I wear womens underwear…I love lane Bryant panties I’m a size 18/20 I also love jockeys no pantyline promise panties size 10. Bodysuirs are nice but i.m more of a panty guy. My wife dont know I want to tell her but I’m not sure on how she will react

    • Del says:

      Tell her you seen a programme on TV and there was a man that said he liked wearing women’s panties and ask her if she would find that odd and see how she reacts, would give you an idea on whether you could approach her about it. Let us know how it goes.

  • Boris says:

    I love wearing knickers, and there’s nothing more appealing to me than finding a girl who is equally turned on by my wearing them as I am. I started wearing them at a very young age, a red lace bikini brief was my first. Then I’d raid knicker drawers as often as possible.

    My ex fiance had the best reaction, and partially set me up. She had a lingerie party and bought various lace thongs, g-strings Brazilians. Then she’d just keep wearing her old ones. I commented on the lack of wearing them one day and came out of the bathroom to find a pair on my pillow, a pink lace thong, she said, “I’ve put your pajamas out”. And so it was for the next 3 years. She’d put them out, and I’d wear them. I didn’t buy a single pair and underpants in the time I knew her.

    What started as a night time game, became a full time thing, she’d choose what knickers I’d wear every day, and I would without question. I surprised her one day as we were walking around the supermarket by telling her I was not only wearing her knickers, but also her stockings and suspenders. She instantly got flushed and decided that was enough grocery shopping for the day.

    We’d sometimes make a game of arguing over knickers, but generally the thongs were mine, it was just once in a while I wanted to see her wearing the skimpy stuff, and she’d frequently oblige.She preferred the low cut briefs, and liked the high waist line knickers on me, so she could see a hint of lace over the top of my jeans.

    I’ve gone in and out of the wearing of knickers over the years, often depending on girlfriends, but have never grown tired of the way they make me feel, strong and surprisingly masculine.

    Over the last 5 years I haven’t worn them much, but just recently stumbled across a website where I used to buy from, their range was really unflattering and boring. So I went and had a look at Victoria’s Secret, who just happened to have a 10 pairs of knickers for $35.00 promotion, so the order was placed for a variety of cheekies, hiphuggers and thongs. I then noticed 2 additional really nice pairs which i’d missed before, so rather than just ordering just the one pair ordered another 7 pairs also on special.

    They have now shut down their online store temporarily because of Covid-19, so my shipment is delayed until further notice. but by now I was really keen to get some on so went on another site. I initially ordered 4 pairs of Brazilian’s. Then as before, i saw another really nice pair, so ordered 3 more (on special), like I didn’t have enough coming already.There we so may specials, i couldn’t stop and used my gift voucher ordering stockings and suspenders and thought it may look funny if I don’t order the bra as well, so have got the full set coming. Not sure about the bra as I’ve never worn one before.

    Now I have more knickers inbound than I know what to do with, the first batch of which arrive tomorrow. I imagine some women would be envious of my collection. But would happily splurge on them at the same rate, to stop them from stealing mine of course. But fairs fair in the stealing of each others knickers, right?

    I knew i wasn’t alone in my love of lace, so googled and found this blog, which people seem to have posted to recently so decided to share. Being between relationships at the moment, I’ve decided to make sure the next girl I date shares my passion, and occasionally my collection, it’ll be fun doing it the other way around for a change.

  • Jon says:

    I’ve been wearing and sniffing panties for 30 years. My wife loves me wearing my own panties. My wife says wearing dirty panties is nasty but when she’s not around I take her dirty panties out the hamper and wear with her finding out. I love the fit and feel of silky or nylon panties.

  • T says:

    I love this. Im a cis male, and I love wearing panties and cross dressing, but I hate the sissy aspect of it myself. I’m not into the humiliation that it seems is very common when trying to find women like you that are encouraging of it. Just doing a quick search and you find thousands of videos of humiliation, forced bi, etc. There are still some of us guys out there who are masculine and even when dressed stay that way. We just like wearing lingerie and a dress. I don’t wanna become a woman, I don’t want to all of a sudden be a slutty little cock gobbling whore, I just like to wear women’s things because I like the way they feel and the way it makes me feel. I’d love to just spend a day having my gf dress me up and sit around the house until it’s too much and neither of us can take it anymore and neither of us is dressed lol.

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