Tag Archives: dating
Why the phrase ‘the ick’ gives me the ick
You know what ‘the ick’ is, right? A feeling you get for someone based off a silly/cringe/weird thing they did or said or are, which torpedoes your burgeoning attraction for them. Little moments of disgust which, once noticed, mean you can no longer fancy that person. It is often understood that ‘the ick’ is both irrational and unavoidable. About a month ago (sorry I’m slow) Stefano Hatfield published an opinion piece in the I Paper about how terrible ‘the ick’ is as a concept, so it feels like a good time to dust off my rant about why I hate this phrase so very much.
Love yourself: Test date with a blog reader part 2
If you missed the first part, here’s an overview: I had a test date with a blog reader, “Jack”, who took me up on my offer to do a phone chat and message exchange then give him feedback on where he might be going wrong. It was also a challenge for me. I am prone to avoiding constructive critique because I’m a rampant people-pleaser who never wants to upset anybody. Would I be able to tell Jack where he was going wrong without burying anything useful in a torrent of consoling positivity? Let’s see, shall we?
Guest blog: Our first BDSM date
Today’s guest blog is another fabulous team effort, by two writers who wanted to capture the intimacy, excitement and hotness of their first BDSM date. Please welcome The Petite (her) and The Giant (him), who met online when he came across one of her fantasies, and offered to help her fulfil it. Belt, BDSM, anal and more. A glorious first encounter told from two perspectives: she begins the story, and his contributions are indented and woven throughout.
Questions and positivity: Test date with a blog reader
When I posted the following offer, I didn’t expect anyone to take me up on it: “I have no Valentine’s plans so am considering lining up phone dates… I’ll date you then explain why you’re failing. Tempted?” But somebody did! A dude who genuinely wanted to get better at dating, and asked for my help to pinpoint where he might be going wrong. Here’s what happened when I had a test date with a blog reader.
“What are you gonna do about it?” An ode to bratty subs
Perhaps it’s my age, or I’m experiencing a sudden and temporary burst of self-confidence – maybe my therapy’s working? Whatever the reason, I’ve been feeling a lot more domme lately. As often as I used to yearn for powerful, toppy guys with wickedly menacing grins, now I dream about bratty subs who have a playfully cheeky, ‘what are you gonna do about it?’ energy.