Remember last Wednesday’s blog post, where my partner injured his hand and then gave me a cute compliment? That unscripted compliment wasn’t the only good thing to come out of his DIY disaster. As he pointed out soon after he’d mangled his palm, in a voice tinged with horror and distress: that was his wanking hand. He is not a man who goes without a wank easily, and I’m not a girl who misses the opportunity for a new kind of mutual masturbation. So we set to work…

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As I might have mentioned a few very excited times – on Patreon and in Wednesday’s blog post – I have recently bought a massive mirror and mounted it on the wall opposite the end of my bed. I’ve always had mirrors in my bedroom – a dressing-table mirror that gives a good side-view of doggy and a larger mirror high on the wall that is angled so I can watch my partner having a wank while I do my hair in the morning. But with this new mirror comes a new angle, and a new idea.

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I like things that are new and different, and sex toys that do stuff I haven’t felt before. That doesn’t mean that all those sex toys will get me off: if I wanted a reliable, functional, powerful wank then I would never deviate from my Doxy. But I like sex toys that make me feel new things. The Queen Bee is one of those sex toys, and thanks to the fact that I work with the company, I got to play with an early version and then write about it before other people get their hands on one, so I am going to grasp this opportunity with… well, with one hand. The hand I am not currently using to hold the Queen Bee to my clit. Let us commence.

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My dude and I are walking down the street on the way to catch a train. It’s fairly late, and the streets are filled with tanked-up football fans and loved-up students off their tits on MDMA so naturally, there are police. Just in front of us, a pair of young police officers get out of a panda car in their stab vests. She’s mid-twenties, with short blond hair and the kind of muscle tone you’d need to restrain a suspect. He’s slightly older, and has a solid heft to him that I’d imagine would feel achingly good on top of me during a struggle-fuck.

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I’m delighted to be able to present you with an Easter-themed post today, courtesy of the fantastic Jenny Guérin (who you can follow on Twitter here). Jenny has written here for me before about withdrawing consent in a BDSM scene – and how it’s far easier than the people who write UK porn laws seem to think. Today she’s tackling a challenge I’d love to see more people have a go at: swapping mainstream porn for more ethical porn. How did Jenny do with her personal challenge of giving up mainstream porn for lent?

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