Category Archives: Unsolicited advice
Eavesdropping on phone sex, and the kind of voyeur I am
The other day I spent a lovely couple of hours listening to men wanking. It was obscenely fun. Dudes pleasuring themselves is one of my biggest kinks, and the more gutturally raw it is, the better. It’s often tricky to explain the detail of this kink, in a world where ‘porn’ is too often synonymous with the male gaze: a perspective that focuses on the bodies/faces/noises of the women involved in a fuck, and rarely ever on the bodies/faces/noises of the men doing the fucking. Sometimes what looks like a ‘traditional’ male-gaze thing gives excellent opportunity for a voyeur like me. I’m not getting off to the same thing the guys are, I’m getting off to the fact they’re getting off. Let’s explore this…
Time-saving sex tips for busy slags
Although there’s a part of me that wishes I could be more chilled-out, there’s another – much bigger – part that craves efficiency in everything. I want to cut down on time spent doing unnecessary shit, mainly to make more time for fucking. Bottom line: I am a very busy slag, and I thought I’d share some of my time-saving sex tips with you.
Unscripted compliments, and knowing I’m your hero
Sometimes the best compliments are the ones you least expect. Mine came out of the blue about 4:30 on a rainy Saturday afternoon, while we were having a massive argument. Well, not exactly. We were fuming in the silent aftermath of a massive argument – each getting on with our own thing and wondering if we could pull this shit together before the evening began and we realised we wanted to be friends again.
You excite me. Even after years: you excite me
When we first got together, I was excited about dating you. I remember the outfit I wore on one afternoon of peak excitement, when we had nothing planned but a long day of drinking and then fucking on the carpet in your flat. I wore boots, shorts, and a semi-transparent top. Badly applied make-up and a giant grin. I was excited, in a horny way. And in a general way too: you excited me as if we were on our way to Alton Towers and not just the pub up the road.
Sharing sexy fantasies: the edit method
How do you go about sharing sexy fantasies? It’s one of the questions people seem to struggle with a lot – as measured both by my inbox and also the sheer volume of advice guides written about broaching the subject with your partner. But one of the things I find fascinating/annoying about the way it’s presented is that it’s often seen as an ‘all or nothing’ thing: that you tell your partner you want to be dominated (with a strap-on and a vigorous pegging, for example), and they either tell you ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ That’s it: a green light or a red one, and then the discussion has ended. I don’t think that’s how it always works.