Category Archives: The human body
X-factor of sex: the finalists
Remember a couple of weeks ago I thought it would be a great idea to get people to ring me and make sex noises down the phone, in order to win some cool sex toys? Well, I was right – it was an AWESOME idea, because I can now reveal the entries, and they’re brilliant. I challenge you to listen to the following clips and not spend at least a minute grinning in delight. Before we start, here’s a round-up for those who might have missed the excitement: The challenge: I asked people to record their best sex noises – funny, sexy, whatever came out when they channeled their best Meg Ryan. The winner of this X-factor of sex would get three spectacularly awesome sex toys:
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Getting head from a dominant guy
I sometimes struggle with getting head – finding it hard to get out of my comfort zone when I don’t feel any element of my own submission. But when he tells me ‘I want to taste you,’ it is not submissive. He’s not begging me for a lick that I may or may not deign to give him: he’s issuing a command. In the same way as he’s issuing a command if he tells me ‘bend over’ or ‘take off your knickers’ or – holy fuck this happened recently and it still makes me so horny I squirm – ‘squeeze that cock.’ Uttered in a breathless rush just before the grunt as he comes.
Competition: what does an orgasm sound like?
I like running unusual competitions, especially if they produce cool results – like the competition from last year where people drew visual representations of their own orgasm and came up with some awesome imagery. Or the competition the year before where people described their orgasm, and there were some beautiful stories.
We’ve done pictures, we’ve done words, this competition is about sounds.
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What do I look like getting fucked from behind?
It’s a question I’ve asked myself frequently. While it’s possible (and, indeed, hot as all hell) to watch yourself fucking in a mirror, there are some angles that are impossible to achieve, unless you happen to be shagging inside a circus attraction. What’s more, videoing something and having a permanent record of your shag, which could easily be copied/accidentally uploaded to whatever The Cloud is, isn’t always something I’m keen on doing.
So how do you do it? Well, here’s what we did.
For starters, we had three things: a phone, an iPad, and a raging horn. We set up the iPad and the phone to facetime each other. This tactic can be used not just for watching yourselves fuck from new and improved angles, it can also be used to watch one person having a wank. I know, you may prefer to be in the same room, but if like me you want to get as close as possible to the sensation of watching someone who doesn’t know you’re there, then setting up a phone in the corner of one room while you perv furtively in another can be a truly excellent bet. The other person has to know it’s there, obviously, but if they concentrate hard enough they can try and forget: making sure they’re focusing on their own pleasure rather than playing to the camera.
So, facetime. The only realistic way I could find out what I looked like getting fucked from behind, without having to actually record it. He held the phone, and I propped the iPad on a pillow in front of me before getting on my hands and knees…
10 of my favourite sexy illustrations
For over a year now, Stuart F Taylor (aka @chainbear on twitter) has been drawing illustrations to go with my blog posts. They’re stunning things, each one custom drawn to go with a particular post. Whether it’s a specific sex act (like spanking) or an abstract concept (like edging yourself to orgasm), each and every one of them is a work of sexy art.
Stuart’s going to be taking a very well-earned break for a month or so, so I thought it might be a nice opportunity to give you a run-down of some of my favourite sexy illustrations that he’s drawn over the last year or so. Problem with picking favourites though, is that I love every single one of them so it’s pretty much impossible to choose – head to the image galleries (SFW one + NSFW one) and check out the others.