Sex toys for men: I love them, some people hate them, but every sex and relationships columnist has to have an opinion on them. And some of those opinions are bullshit. While I’ll often get very shouty about facts, very rarely would I tell someone that their opinion is bullshit, but in the case of male sex toys I am comfortable doing this. Because if you think that sex toys for men are somehow less acceptable than sex toys for anyone else, chances are you’re doing this based on either bad facts or an incomplete grasp of the benefits of sex toys. Not only are you catastrophically wrong, you’re also doing an entirely unnecessary harm.
There are two threads to the story I want to tell today. The first thread is so obvious it feels almost trite to mention it: I want to tell you about a particularly brilliant g-spot dildo, which stimulates me in a way not many others do. The second thread is about being hand-fucked. Not ‘wanked off’, not ‘masturbated’: being hand-fucked. Sometimes I write fucking stories that are about speed or enthusiasm or energy. I’ll tell you that this or that fuck was intense, or fun, or orgasmic. This fuck, though? This fuck was thorough.
This week Theresa May signed the letter officially triggering Article 50 to begin the process of taking the UK out of the EU. Not very sexy, obviously, so other than writing a parody of the appalling treatment of May and Sturgeon in the Daily Mail, I didn’t have any Brexit-related inspiration for the blog this week. Then, like an angel descending from on high to give a combination of humour and genuinely useful insight, came Ruby l’Ace from Knicker Rocker Glory. She’s here to explain how Brexit could affect your sex life…
Last week journalists had a ball with the news that We Vibe has agreed to pay out millions of dollars to users of its ‘smart’ sex toys, after a legal dispute surrounding the data that the company collected about toy use. Some users were understandably annoyed by this, and they launched a class action which cost We Vibe millions of dollars to settle. But it hasn’t put me off smart sex toys: not one tiny little bit. And I’m going to try and explain why.
The most important thing to remember about electrosex is that the smaller the surface area, the more intense the sensation. Where you draw the line between pleasure and pain depends on your own threshold. I like warm, broad sensations. The smack of an open palm. The heavy thwack of a thick leather belt. Electricity that tingles over my skin when he places a full hand on the back of my thigh. Other people like intense, pinpoint pain: the sting of the cane, leaving a lattice of thin red welts to show you took it well. With electrosex there’ll be no marks, but the rule applies: the smaller the surface area, the more intense the sensation. Today I want to tell you about the ElectraStim Jack Socket.