One Weird Trick To Blow Their Mind In Bed

Image by the brilliant Stuart F Taylor

I thought there were none. I thought there were no bed-located tricks that were universal. I assumed that all humans, due to our unique-like-snowflake sexual preferences and genital configuration and kinks and quirks and loves: I thought there would be no universal Trick To Blow Their Mind In Bed.

But if there were one, and I’m not necessarily saying there is, then it might be this:

INT. BEDROOM. NIGHT. 

GOTN enters the room having brushed her teeth, and done all the pre-sleep rituals she’ll usually do before settling down for the night. 

BLOKE is lying in the bed, snuggled comfily under the duvet. 

GOTN: Why are you on my side of the bed?

BLOKE: Oh, sorry.

BLOKE moves to other side of the bed. 

GOTN: Do you want to sleep on my side?

BLOKE: No, no. I just forgot.

GOTN: I’m intrigued by this. Did you… did you just forget that was my side?

BLOKE: No. I just forgot to move over.

GOTN: Eh?

BLOKE: Well, when I get in the bed first, and you go to brush your teeth and whatnot, I lie on your side. Then when I hear you coming I move over to mine.

GOTN: Why?

BLOKE: To warm up yours, so when you get in it’s not freezing.

GOTN: Do you do this every night?

BLOKE: Only in winter.

Consider my mind well and truly blown.

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