Regular readers will know that I am a sucker for stories about long-term relationships where sex is a shared joy. I wrote about this a few years ago, and the longing I have for someone I can be with long term, who embarks on sex as a playful adventure. While I tear myself to pieces in the hunt for that, it’s wonderful to hear stories from people who have found their own ways to navigate intimacy in long-term relationships, especially if they’re willing to share the ups and downs of their journey. So I’m delighted to welcome Sean Owen, who writes about intimacy, curiosity and the evolution of long term love and has been with his wife Sophie for 24 years, to do exactly that.

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Unlike with suck jobs, I’m going to launch into this piece without any preamble whatsoever: here are five different ways to suck a dick. There are many more ways to suck a dick than this, but these are the first 5 types of blow job that popped into my head. Feel free to expand in the comments, I am always keen to share knowledge with other expert cocksuckers.

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Today’s guest blog is something a little different, because I really want to introduce you to the fabulous person behind The Pleasure Garden – an awesome ethical sex toy shop that sponsors my website. If you’d like to buy stuff you can use the code GOTN10 for 10% off anything they stock, but I’m not trying to actively sell you anything here, I just wanted to introduce you to someone cool: Francesca Cross, who runs it. I have written about a number of fantastic Pleasure Garden products over the years, from restraints kits to g-spot vibes, and door cuffs to doppelganger dicks. And whenever I have a catch-up with Francesca to talk about what I could review next, we always end up in a fascinating sidebar about the challenges involved in trying to carve an ethical path through the adult industry: how to improve accessibility, how to make sure the toys in stock are body safe, how to write copy for websites in a way that is inclusive and never shaming. I thought you lot might like to see a glimpse behind the scenes, and meet someone awesome who is working to do exactly that. So I interviewed Francesca! Grab a cup of tea and learn about running an ethical sex toy shop in the UK…

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It feels weird turning up to work when fascism is on the rise. It certainly does for me, anyway. Why am I still posting porn? Who wants to wank when we’re scared about the people we love? Erik’s guest blog pitch couldn’t have come at a better time, when I’ve been wrestling with this question and feeling monstrously silly for continuing to do this horny little job even as I’m shaking with rage at the news. He’s here to talk about the power of horny feelings, and joy, and why we shouldn’t abandon sex in the time of fascism. I’m so very grateful to him for sharing this incredible post.

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This week’s guest blog is a fabulous rant by Liv Arnold – an erotic author who has a bone to pick with men who expect blow jobs but don’t want to return any oral favours. Perhaps it’s the fact that I’m getting more ‘fuck this’ in my forties than I was a decade ago, but I find it joyful to read stories about people who have realised they no longer want to accept mediocre – or outright bad – treatment from people and have worked out the perfect way to say ‘no’. You don’t have to do things in bed that you don’t want to, and that means you’re allowed to walk away from sex where the pleasure is so one-sided. Take it away Liv…

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