Today’s guest blog is pretty fucking special. It’s written by James Mycroft, who you might remember from this lovely guest poem from a few weeks ago. Today’s post is very different. Where there was longing in his poem, here there is lustful agony. While that poem was about being apart, this one’s about being together – intensely and explicitly. James is going to tell you all about dick vibrations and orgasm control. And because his timing in pitching me this idea matched neatly with the release of the Hot Octopuss Pocket Pulse dick vibrator, I asked them to send one to him to try out. Brace yourselves because this is entirely Not Safe For Work.

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This week’s guest blog is by a fantastic fellow blogger – Isabelle Lauren. She writes with touching candour about sex and libido after having a hysterectomy. It’s a brilliant piece, and it gave me an insight into not only one of the ways in which sex can be a struggle, but also about how vital patience and communication are when dealing with sexual difficulties. Check out her brilliant blog (and in particular this recent piece on the sex/violence distinction for over-18 content, which I really enjoyed) and follow her on Twitter @RomanticIsa.

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Every year I try to write something about how Valentine’s Day is mostly a bundle of gendered expectation and obligation wrapped in a parcel of guilt. That doesn’t stop it being fun for some people (and nor should it), but hopefully it does help people who feel shit about the whole thing to feel a little less shit and a little more like it doesn’t really matter. But I’m a sex blogger, so if I don’t write anything about Valentine’s Day I’ll get letters. So, as a compromise I’ve written a guide to things you can buy as Valentine’s Day gifts for yourself. Hoard them, enjoy them, publicly propose to them if you want to, just don’t give them to anyone else: there are other gift guides for that.

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I’m kind of obsessed with door cuffs at the moment. Simple velcro handcuffs that come attached to short metal poles, which you use by hooking them over the door. They mean you can effectively tie someone’s wrists up high while you tease them, and my partner uses them to make me beg for it.

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Good sex writing should – in my opinion – make you do something. Breathe a little faster, maybe. Reach into your pants, sometimes. Get in touch with someone you’ve been lusting after for ages… Well, this week’s guest blog made me squirm and wriggle and blush a bit while I was reading, then crave a little of this kind of scene myself. So please give a blushing, warm welcome to today’s guest blogger – international Mistress and courtesan Valerie August – with a story about how sometimes even a professional Mistress might need a little nurturing and discipline to guide her…

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