It’s a question I’ve asked myself frequently. While it’s possible (and, indeed, hot as all hell) to watch yourself fucking in a mirror, there are some angles that are impossible to achieve, unless you happen to be shagging inside a circus attraction. What’s more, videoing something and having a permanent record of your shag, which could easily be copied/accidentally uploaded to whatever The Cloud is, isn’t always something I’m keen on doing.
So how do you do it? Well, here’s what we did.
For starters, we had three things: a phone, an iPad, and a raging horn. We set up the iPad and the phone to facetime each other. This tactic can be used not just for watching yourselves fuck from new and improved angles, it can also be used to watch one person having a wank. I know, you may prefer to be in the same room, but if like me you want to get as close as possible to the sensation of watching someone who doesn’t know you’re there, then setting up a phone in the corner of one room while you perv furtively in another can be a truly excellent bet. The other person has to know it’s there, obviously, but if they concentrate hard enough they can try and forget: making sure they’re focusing on their own pleasure rather than playing to the camera.
So, facetime. The only realistic way I could find out what I looked like getting fucked from behind, without having to actually record it. He held the phone, and I propped the iPad on a pillow in front of me before getting on my hands and knees…
Already pretty wet, and excited by the new possibilities of this experiment, I fidgeted a bit while he got the phone into the right position, keeping me from getting too bored by occasionally showing me some gorgeous close-up shots of his dick. So far, so hot, but it wasn’t anything I’d not seen before.
When he was in the right position, he showed me something I hadn’t seen before: my cunt.
Now I don’t want you to think I’ve spent my life avoiding my cunt like the sight of it will burn my eyes. I do see it quite frequently – if I’m shaving, for instance, in front of a mirror. But I’ve never seen it from quite that angle: right up close, smooshed between my thighs as I’m bent over. Displayed in the way I’d normally do when there was a guy behind me ready to bury his dick in it. It was… new and weird. Not ‘hot’ weird but not a turn-off either. I was facing forward, staring at the iPad propped in front of me, and seeing my cunt in extreme porn close-up on the screen made it feel like it wasn’t really mine.
What’s more, when he moved the phone further away so I could see it framed by my arse, the whole picture looked even odder. Who is this stranger and why is she in my bedroom? I’m used to seeing me from my own perspective – this other perspective made me feel like everything belonged to someone else. It was oddly disconnected. Also I have spots on my arse. The guy pointed out that this is basically normal for a human, especially a human who spends most of her day sitting in front of a laptop, but it did make me wonder if I need to be flogged more often, for exfoliation purposes.
Now for the sexy part
I appreciate that describing this is not the sexiest way to start a blog entry, but I promise you it got better. In fact, it got instantly better the second his dick touched me. After the disembodied sensation of staring at the iPad and wondering whose body was on screen, I was suddenly able to connect the sensation – slick head of his solid dick pushing at the entrance to my cunt – with what I was seeing – slick head of his dick pushing… you get the picture.
I kept my eyes on the screen as he slid inside. Having never filmed myself actually fucking, this was the first detailed view I’d had of someone’s cock pushing into me: the sensation of being stretched twinned with the visuals of actually watching it go in.
It was amazing.
I started pushing back, but realised I’d screw up the angle, so I stayed as still as I could while he fucked. Building up from a slow rhythm into something faster as his dick throbbed closer to the conclusion.
I wanted to see more, though – I wanted to see not just the detail but the view that he had. He moved the phone and showed me the wide shot – the curve of my arse narrowing to my waist, the arch of my back, my shoulders tense as I gripped the bedposts for balance. It was… nice? Interesting. New. As someone who’d usually rather cry than compliment her own body, I was surprised to find it pretty hot. I moved my arms, arched my back further, changed position so I could watch the changes on the screen: assuring myself that this person – this surprising, weird, different, possibly-hot person – was me.
Later we went for the more hardcore shots – placing the camera facing upwards between my legs on the bed, so we could watch from beneath as his dick slammed forward to meet my cunt. The lips of my cunt kissing the base of his cock, then his wet dick sliding out again for another stroke. We fumbled, a bit, and had to keep rearranging as our strokes got quicker or more enthusiastic and the camera started to slip.
He smacked my arse and I remembered the view, and as we fucked harder we lost sight of the iPad as it toppled over into the mess of bedsheets. It didn’t matter, we’d got the images now. As I squeezed my cunt tight around him and felt him come inside me, I pictured that first image – the head of his dick pressing right up against me.
And given that I’ve pictured it more since then, that I can now conjure it in my mind whenever I look at his iPhone, I’m glad we never pressed record: I don’t think we ever needed to.
While my regular illustrator is away, I’ve a few brilliant people drawing gorgeous things for the blog. Guest art for this blog post is by the fantastic Hayley Blair Lockwood, who you can follow on Twitter @hayleyglyphs or instagram @hayleyglyphs too.