Two things: feminism, censorship and condom personality tests

Image by the brilliant Stuart F Taylor

Here goes: a round-up of some things you need to read. Which I’m switching to Friday because, hey, who wants to do work on Friday when you could instead be reading about feminism, censorship and condoms?

The good: Bridget Minamore on choice and feminism

Can you be a feminist and take nude selfies/wear make-up/eat a packet of Wotsits? Bridget Minamore neatly sums up the problem with the seemingly endless examination of whether a certain decision is feminist or not:

“Last week, the Guardian’s Hadley Freeman argued that “empowerment” had lost its meaning, citing selfies and Spanx as just two examples in which women have had empowerment marketed to them. But I think this perpetuates a stale conversation. Sometimes, it’s just not that deep; whether it’s narcissistic or not, people can simply like taking photos of themselves. Women aren’t saying that all selfies, all the time, are always feminist.”

It’s something I’ve tried to put my finger on before, but never quite got there, and so Bridget’s piece is now my go-to link to send people when they ask if a certain thing is feminist or not.

Read the full piece here, and if you don’t already follow Bridget on Twitter then you should. She’s ace.

The bad: porn censorship as a replacement for sex education

In case you’ve missed it, a recent policy note from the DCMS (Department for Culture, Media and Sport) created waves by suggesting that restricting access to porn would help ‘protect’ young people from anal sex. There are lots of problems with this.

First, check out this fantastic blog by Cicely Marston, who co-authored the research DCMS based its note on: The government cited my research in its campaign against porn and anal sex – here’s why I disagree

Secondly, Pandora Blake has also written a fantastic overview of the objections to the government’s approach. It’s a treasure-trove of interesting links and reading.

“There are no simple technological solutions to social problems. Rather than restricting internet freedom, efforts would be better spent on improving and funding sex education in schools; making it a mandatory part of the curriculum, and making it more relevant to the internet age.”

Bonus thing: Condoms as a personality test

The above two bits were quite heavy for a Friday, weren’t they? So here’s something lighter.

Abbi Rode is an awesome sex blog run by Abbi – she writes a combination of sexy, funny, and occasionally enraging anecdotes. This morning I spotted her latest post on condoms, and the way in which people talk about them. Positive, negative, occasionally whiny? Basically someone’s attitude towards your sexual health boundaries can tell you quite a lot about whether they’re a dick.

“he claimed that sex with condoms bored him as it made things too linear. Mother of divine Jesus have you ever heard the like?”

I love Abbi. She’s ace.

Have a lovely weekend, and if you have a spare minute please go and review my book on Amazon. I know, I ask you this frequently, but that’s because I really want you to do it.


  • Hazelthecrow says:

    Mmmm, the condom thing. I actually like them – not the thing itself so much as the ritual and anticipation of putting on on – that pause that says ‘we are definitely about to do some sex now, oh yes!’ And more than that, its the connotations of consideration that go along with it. That if he’s being sensible with me, he’s probably been sensible with anyone else he may have slept with – the reverse also being true. Knowing the dude is prepared, safe and considerate makes it so much easier to let go of worry and enjoy a thoroughly raunchy time. If ever a guy makes a fuss about using them thats me instantly turned off, mentally and physically. My lady parts actually shut down with a big old Nope. You can practically hear the portcullis clanging down!

    • Girl on the net says:

      Haha, I am in love with your portcullis analogy =D I think I’m with you on the sexiness of condoms – I think they *can* be sexy, although I tend to see them that way for psychological reasons more than physical ones. i wrote a thing about it a while ago, but yeah, that moment of knowing ‘we’re definitely shagging now’ is pretty damn fun!

  • Henry Davidson says:

    It is worth checking out one of the comments on Abbi’s post about the way the condom needs to fit the cock.

    I was troubled for years by condoms threatening to fall off. Then a clever (and very sexy) girl diagnosed the problem. When erect, my cock is not very long but is more than usually wide. Bigger size condoms stay on! Problem solved.

    It is not easy for straight men to know how their cock, when stiff, compares to the average. It takes honest advice from an experienced woman!

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