“Men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses”? Pah. Maybe more will after reading this post. Here’s why glasses can be incredibly sexy, and a few hot things to do if you want to include glasses in your sex games…
I’ll admit that they’re annoying, glasses: they’re expensive and fragile and they get in the way. They steam up when you open the oven, and when you walk into a warm pub, and when you do… well, anything at all if I’m honest.
But they’re hot. And Dorothy Parker was wrong: men often make passes at girls who wear glasses. Why wouldn’t they?
There are plenty of things that I find pleasing as sex accessories. Not sex toys as such, just small items that can make all the difference, visually, when you’re having a decent fuck. A thick watch on a guy’s wrist that accentuates the rhythm when he’s jerking off, for instance. A well-placed tattoo that peeks out, just above his hipbones and over the waistband of his pants. A particularly bright nail varnish on my fingers, as I spit on the tips and rub them slowly round the head of his twitching cock. Ankle bracelets. Lip piercings. Dog tags. Rings.
All these things are hot because they accentuate a different body part of whoever I’m fucking, or of my own body. It zooms my attention to a particular thing, when it would otherwise be easy to see the whole thing in wide-shot, missing the sexiness of a particular detail.
Glasses can do that too. You only have to worship the neatly-plucked smirk of Alex Vause in Orange Is The New Black to realise that glasses can be deeply sexy.
But they can be sexy in other ways too.
That moment when – before a fuck – he takes his glasses off slowly and deliberately, folding each arm neatly down towards the frame. He turns away from me briefly, his attention focused purely on the precision of the movement.
That movement says to me ‘I’m preparing for this.’
Or ‘I’ll be rough.’
And ‘This fuck will get you messy.’
He places his glasses down on the table with a click, and then turns back with a look that says ‘let’s go.’
But that’s nothing compared to what glasses can do when I keep them on: slow, languid blow jobs while I look up at him over the rim. My vision might be blurry, but he’ll get a clear view of my wet eyes as I glance upwards. The steam on the glass as he grips my hair and pushes my face into his hot, wet crotch. The smears of spit and precum on the lenses towards the end.
The end, oh God.
Splatters of spunk hitting my glasses like thick rain. Why has no one ever done this to me? Come hard and heavy on my glasses, I mean. Covered them with jizz and then told me to lick them clean – watched me on my knees as I run my tongue over them.
Called me a good girl when they’re clean.
Come to think of it, why has no guy ever made me wear his glasses – the power they have to transform someone’s face should be so much fun to fuck with. I want a guy to make me wear his glasses, so they’re blurring my vision with a not-quite-blindfold, while he revels in the unusual sight of an almost-stranger, choking hard down on his cock. Fucking my throat till they’re steamed and smeary, and emptying himself so hard I have to gag before I swallow it.
Then when he’s done, I want him to stroke my hair, and take my head gently in his hands. Grip the frames lightly, and – with delicate precision – transfer the glasses back from my face to his. Pick my own pair off the floor and slide them neatly back in place.
Then we’ll look at each other, with clear vision and post-fuck grins, and seal the deal with one of those nerdy kisses. You know the ones: where your frames clink together as you find each other’s lips – like a toast to your sexy success.
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