This blog post was written in response to the question: are there any sex things that you don’t like? Here’s where my mind went first.
I am probably similar to a lot of British people who grew up in the late nineties, in that I first encountered rimming on Queer as Folk (the UK version, which is categorically better than the US version because of Stuart Alan Jones). In the first ever episode, Nathan (played by Charlie Hunnam when he was young and pre-beardy) gets naked and thoroughly fucked by the stunning Aidan Gillen. Amid the sweat and the panting and the deafening thud of my aching, hormonal cunt, I heard Stuart (Aidan Gillen) ask Nathan what he was into. Nathan pauses so Stuart prompts:
“Rimming?”
There’s a pause, as we realise that the young ‘un has absolutely no idea what that is. Still, he’s as horny as a teenager with a hot guy sweating all over him, so obviously he says yes. And the sight of Stuart’s tongue sliding wetly up and down Nathan’s back, eventually coming to rest in the crack of his buttocks is something I still occasionally kill kittens over.
But of course, alongside all my other thoughts – are there nerve endings there? Is it really pleasurable? If I asked him really nicely, would an Aidan Gillen lookalike ever do the same to me? – was the most important rimming-related question: what does it actually taste like?
What does ass taste like?
Obviously you can’t just ask someone: “excuse me, what does your ass taste like?” While it’s fine to offer your partner the pleasure of a rim-job, asking them prior to the event what they anticipate their personal flavour is, is probably a bit of a faux pas.
So I’m here to tell you: it’s essentially quite boring. To me, at any rate. It’s not awful, it’s just not vanilla ice-cream. It has a vaguely chemical, bitter taste, which naturally is influenced by other factors: how recently they’ve sweated (I like the taste of sweat: it is way better than the taste of ass), whether there’s lube in the general vicinity, how recently they’ve showered, etc, although the taste hasn’t varied much between individual people. While spunk flavours can vary wildly, running a broad gamut between sweet and savoury, I can’t say I’ve noticed a huge amount of difference in the taste of someone’s bum. You might think differently, and if so please do chip in: as you may have guessed I’m not a rimming connoisseur.
There’s a certain brand of lube that I think tastes exactly like rimming. I don’t want to mention it here, because I feel like for the company itself it may count as bad publicity. It’s a good lube, and I use it for lots of other things, but I tend to avoid giving head straight after using it on a guy’s dick, because it reminds me too much of ass to mouth. But if you find an unflavoured, unscented, water-based lube and you get that slightly chemical tang? You’ve probably stumbled on The One.
I’ve rimmed a few guys, and had it done to me a few times, and most times it’s been pretty soon after a shower. I’d hazard a guess and say that the majority of people, if you’re planning to stick your tongue in their ass, will do you the courtesy of scrubbing it beforehand. Thing is: shower gel also has a bitter and chemically taste, so while it might smell of roses, it certainly doesn’t taste like them. Or maybe it does – who the hell eats roses?
I’ll be straight with you and tell you that rimming does very little for me. If you’re different, and you fancy having a go, then The Big Gay Review has a brilliant guide on how to do it. In the meantime, here’s a short and sweet story about the first time I ever rimmed someone, and a small explanation as to why even the things I don’t like can turn into things that I do…
First time rimming
Hmm… I’m not exactly sure what I do here. I mean, I know he’s done it to me before and it felt like a kind of… snog, I guess? Like he was snogging my bum? Shall I try that?
OK. He’s reacting. I can’t quite tell if that’s a shudder of desire or suppressed giggling because it tickles. I’ll try it a bit harder.
Squirming? Squirming’s good, I think. And that was definitely a moan. I’m not sure what to do now though – where exactly do I go from here? I’ve snogged, I’ve tongued, I’ve pried his cheeks apart and sort of massaged him with my mouth.
Maybe I could try and reach the prostate? I’ve quite a long tongue but that’d be a stretch even for me.
I’ll just do this some more.
And some more.
And. Christ, I’m bored. I wonder if he’s bored t-
“Hey, shall we fuck now?”
“Yes. Thank Christ.”
It was fairly similar the other way around. I’ve been with some people who love doing it – for whom just the experience of burying their face in my arse and sticking their tongue as far in as possible is arousing in and of itself. And therein lies the charm of rimming. The reason why, despite my general feeling of ‘meh’ that surrounds the whole thing, I’ve still done it more than once.
Because although the taste isn’t particularly awesome, and the pleasure I get from it is about a ‘2’ on the 1-10 scale of ‘things that make my cunt twitch’, there’s still the tiny hope that one day I’ll do it and the rimmee’s face will light up with ecstatic delight. The joy of a brand new sensation. The face, in short, that Nathan made when Stuart gave him his first ever rim job.
23 Comments
I remember going out to dinner with my boss and her best friend about a week after Queer as Folk premiered. “What did Stuart mean when he said ‘they didn’t tell you about _that_ one?’ to Nathan?” my boss asked, because I’m a gay and thus know everything about sex.
So I had to explain rimming to two straight women while eating in a cheese restaurant in New Pudsey. They were shocked and appalled. It was Not For Them. Ah well.
I am a fan of giving a lady’s daisy a little swirly, part of the bigger cunning-linguistics ‘arse’nal I employ. I don’t mind saying, it’s a turn on. It just tastes like skin to me, and with you on the lube taste, it’s often like the faded ghost of Bonjela….
Never been on the receiving end of it, but my GF has expressed an interest in reciprocating when I get to stick my face in her pants….
I like giving and receiving – but, sadly, it doesn’t seem to be on the menu a lot of the time. There’s still a huge taboo about it and it seems more unusual than it should be. Or maybe that’s the guys I’ve been picking…
I love it when a man does it to me!
And i love giving.
Nice, I love eating a fit woman’s asshole out, it’s just so horny and erotic. I’d eat yours Lola, if you asked 😊
Arse*
Oh hey fuck off.
Wouldn’t you need to spell your name “Paenkfoun” to try to score that point?
I generally find naked arses intensely attractive – which is odd because I’ve always been more into thinks like eyelids and noses and stomachs (but none of those in a particularly sexual way – I’m not even sure if eyelid sex is a thing) – and, as a result, I do tend to kiss, lick and occasionally rim when I can. I check first to see if she’s down with it, of course, and (joy of joys!), most of the time, it’s a turn-on.
I’m with you on the taste – albeit with the varying factors you mention above; that which one might expect an anus to taste like doesn’t actually taste like it (thankfully…). I think some of the (perceived) stigma about analingus is focused around the fact that it’s a sexual act performed upon something which isn’t “designed” to be used for sex. On a purely puritanical level, that seems to make sense; realistically, though, it genuinely doesn’t; the scene from Queer as Folk you mention, as well as gay ecumenical film Priest, shows it in a slightly more ‘acceptable’ light… but usually as a gay thing.
Which it isn’t. It’s universal.
Anyway, after rimming my second girlfriend for a while, she asked me if she wanted her to do it to me, to see if I liked it… and I declined. I have no idea if I’d like it or not, but I have an intense dislike of my own anus (due to the amount of abdominal problems I’ve had and the resultant crippling pain and unpleasant trips to the toilet in the middle of the night – and, at one point, hospital) and I didn’t really want to subject her to that.
In conclusion, then, yes, I do like rimming – basically on account of the fact that it’s pleasurable for her, and that’s what matters – but I’ve never been on the receiving end, and I don’t want to be, but I do occasionally wonder whether that’s a genuine thing, oir if it’s just fear of the unknown that’s holding me back.
I was in a relationship with a sugar mumma that was into kinky things and I’ve always had a high sex drive but when she suggested doing this to me I hesitated for some time then eventually one day let her give it a go, I was very surprised at how pleasurable it was. I’m with a new lady now and after we were comfortable enough with eachother to discuss it she decided to give it a go and is getting more into it everytime we try it. And as for possible uncomfort or pain from the experience, unlike a toy, penis or finger a tongue is very gentle and sensual so if at all you do decide to try it remember you can always stay stop. Your partner will be understanding
Sorry I should clear up that I wanted to do it to her and she is now getting into it, I wouldn’t ask her to do it to me but if she offered I probably wouldn’t refuse but I’ve got one hairy asshole
There’s a bit in The Married Man by Edmund White that describes “the stale cucumber taste of his arsehole” – I think that’s it pretty exactly.
I’ve never had it done and I’ve just asked Peter and neither has he despite all those seventies’ orgies. See GOTN, your blog causes discussions on the subjects it contains. Two pensioners wondering why no one has ever wanted to rim us. I suppose if Peter wanted to do it to me I’d be up for it, but my anus has never exhibited any of the wonderful sensations which materialise just a couple of inches f’wrd.
Peter has banged me in the arse a couple of times, but it did nothing for me and he said he much preferred the alternative orifices so we never bothered again. I tried to give him a prostate massage once or twice, but it did nothing for him, although he got a more energetic climax from it with a previous lover. I’ve never offered again or been asked and he knows I’d do anything he ever wanted.
My trouble with all anal action is that I can’t settle down after it until the man has gone and thoroughly washed his penis or finger. Shit is an awful smell and full of nasty bugs. Breaking off after a finger in your bum to make him scrub his finger and fingernail is hardly a very romantic part of lovemaking.
Sorry. Just intended to say a quick “yeuch no”, but it seems to have morphed into something longer. Sorry.
But don’t ever stop entertaining us with your exploits. They’re wonderful!
There are ways of cleaning the anus cavity for butt play and analingus by using an enemy or douche. The enema cleans tho bowl rather than the anus and the douche system is safer to use between that some wet wipes in the unlikely event of something going and some mouth wash it’s very safe and fun
* enema
My experience suggests the chemical taste is probably mostly the aforementioned shower gel. All I’ve ever noticed are sweat-related flavors, in varying degrees of “muskiness.”
I have SO MUCH to say about this, I can’t even start. I can give a detail of tastes and hygiene standards per country (I have data points from Argentina, the UK, Ukraine, France, a couple US states and Peru), and a detail explanation of the delights of not only rimming but sticking my tongue as deeply inside a lady’s butt as physically possible. The feeling of power when she squirms in pleasure, and the potential of turning someone who doesn’t usually enjoy anal play.
Learn to love this. It’s lovely. Also, get your partner to shower right before. And learn what a bidet is.
Funny you should post this (or that I should read it) after I had an experience with this recently… I’d had it briefly done before but nothing to write home about (though it was nice). Recently, however, I got to find out what it was like on the receiving end when the other person is really into it. Amazing, in a word. What was better was it took me entirely by surprise (and it was our first time together). I still am almost certain I wouldn’t want to do it to anyone, but you never know…!
Thank you GOTN for starting this discussion, it is interesting to hear other people’s perspectives on this still quite taboo topic. Rimming doesn’t do an awful lot for me but it is a pleasant, 2 or 3 out of 10. However, for my partner it is a massive turn-on and his arousal makes me so horny that I have stepped over some of my perceived limits to work on this for his pleasure. It is not at all how imagined it and can be fun. If you are open-minded, give it a try, you may be surprised.
Great post and comments. This is my all time favourite to receive. An-ex girlfriend loved to do it (I think mostly because I loved it so much) but neither she nor my current girlfriend like to receive (or even try).
My girlfriend now won’t do it, she know I’d like it and would also like to try a prostate massage but it’s a hard limit for her. I don’t mention it anymore but in the early days we discussed it a bit and she associates it with homosexuality, she’s not homophobic, but she doesn’t want her BF to be gay. I don’t see it that way it all. I wouldn’t want a man to do it to me as I’m attracted to women but it’s part of my body that gives me intense sexual satisfaction when stimulated. It’s such a warm slightly ticklish feeling and it feels like completion and acceptance to have someone be so intimate.
I also think it’s difficult for people including me to actually do because it has to be planned (I would always want to shower instantly before) and also you need to get into quite compromising positions to do it (which also can add an extra element of kink…)
Anyway, my advise to everyone out there is try it, and reciprocate. Maybe one day no one will have body and gender hangups and we’ll all be at it, what a wonderful world that would be….
I love rimming girls asshole.
An interesting thread. I too love rimming a woman and would describe it as a fetish. If my woman has not just showered before we get down to it I will give her an erotic spongeing with a silky soft sea sponge and a creamy but unscented soap. As well as getting her squeaky clean for the pleasures ahead it’s a highy erotic and luxurious form of worship in its own right. With regard to ‘taste’ I have never had a bad experience: on the contrary, the flavour and aroma of a woman’s freshly showered ass is a real turn on as it’s so pheromone rich. Plus every woman tastes different …