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A new thing for 2015 in which we give away free sex toys

UPDATE March 2016: I’ve put this on hold for the moment, for lots of different reasons. I’ll try and revisit it at some point, but for now please don’t submit any more sex fairies requests. 

Ever wanted to test a particular sex toy, or fancied trying your hand at sex blogging? Well, now you can do both, and get paid for it.

As a sex blogger, I am frequently offered new toys to try out – from intense vibrators to amazing bits of bondage equipment. Unfortunately, I find it easier to write hot stories than reviews (other people do sex toy reviews way better than I ever could), and I’d need at least twenty-five lovers and a hell of a lot of clones to cover everything.

So I thought I’d throw the opportunity open to you, and give my sponsor the opportunity to play ‘benevolent sex fairy’ at the same time. If there’s a sex toy (or lingerie set, item of bondage equipment, brand of lube or anything else) that you’ve always wanted to try, then has kindly agreed to make your dreams come true.

All you need to do is leave a comment, or email me with the subject heading ‘sex fairies’ including a link to the product you’d like (from and fifty-ish words on why you really want to try it.

Each month we’ll pick one request to fulfil – whether it’s a desire for that We Vibe you’ve always wanted, or a desperate need to test a new masturbation sheath on your partner.

Then all I need from you is a post about the product (for which you’ll be paid), to go up on my site. You, obviously, get to keep the product forever. Chances are you’ll have made it a bit sticky anyway.

Free sex toys and blogging – how it works

Here’s the deal:

  • Email me at hellogirlonthenet [at] gmail [dot] com with a link to whichever product etc from you want to try out, along with a 50 word summary of why you want to try it. You must include a link to the product, and use the subject heading ‘Sex fairies’ so I can do an easy search and make sure emails don’t get lost in spam.
  • Once a month, we’ll pick one, and SexToys will ship you the product.
  • You use the toy/product/etc, enjoy it, write 500 words or so about it, and send it to me to publish on site. It doesn’t have to be a straight-up toy review, it can be a hot story about how you used it, an overview of why you liked it, or anything else that takes your fancy. In fact, I’d ideally prefer stories and opinion pieces rather than unbiased reviews – as I say, other people do that way better than I could and I don’t want to nick their niche.
  • I pay you £20 for your post when it goes live on the site. Payment can be in vouchers, cash in the post, or any of the other ways I transfer payment for guest blogs. I’m working on a way to pay people directly via bank or PayPal, which should be up and running soon.

Please read this to make sure you qualify

  • You must be over 18
  • You must be based in the UK
  • The product you pick must be available from

You are more likely to get picked if you

  • Make it clear that you’ve read this page
  • Choose a toy which hasn’t been featured here before (search box is on the right if you want to check)
  • Tell me why you want it
  • Don’t just pick the most expensive one! That’s not to say we don’t give out expensive ones, just that the people who’ll get them are the ones who’ve got a fun/interesting story on why they want them

Sound good? Drop me an email at hellogirlonthenet [at] gmail [dot] com, link to your favourite product, and tell me why you’d like one. If you use the word ‘trousers’ in your email I’ll know you’ve read to the end of the instructions, and therefore I’ll give you priority over people who haven’t read the instructions. Sorry for sounding like a dick about this, but I get lots of sex fairies requests from people who clearly haven’t.

I pick new requests to fulfil every few months.

Questions about the free sex toy thing

What’s in it for you, GOTN?

I bloody love being able to be a sex fairy, making people’s sex toy dreams come true. I appreciate that having a large blogging platform is a huge privilege – it means that I’m inundated with requests from people to test out their new toys and products. I have to turn down requests to send me free sex toys, because I have to remain anonymous, but I thought it’d be nice to spread the love a bit.

On top of this, while I love sex toy giveaways (and will probably still run some, so don’t panic!) it’s often tricky picking prizes that appeal to everyone. I’d give away a thousand Doxy massagers if I could, but not everyone has a clitoris, so those who don’t might feel a bit left out. Likewise if all I gave away was Tenga masturbators, people without cocks would inevitably be short-changed. This way you get to pick a product you really love, I get a hot story to put on the blog, and gets the chance to showcase some of the awesome sexy things they sell.

Everyone’s a winner, right?

So… I can pick anything?

Sure – anything they stock (and they have a pretty wide variety). Although I’d recommend you go for something you actually want rather than something just because it’s expensive. Price doesn’t equate directly to pleasure.

Also, I should say up-front that I’m more likely to pick requests that are a bit unusual or interesting, and don’t cover things I’ve done before. Below is a list of products covered already, and I’ll update this as new stuff goes live:

What if I’m not a writer?

Don’t worry about it – I’m not great at maths, cooking, and anything to do with sport – we all have different skills. You don’t have to be a great writer, and if you’re nervous about writing up your use of the toy, let me know when you submit your request, and I’m happy to work with you to get your story online. This might involve me emailing you questions, or you sending some thoughts which I can edit and we’ll work on together – the most important thing is that it’s your opinion, and your passions.

Doesn’t this mean that you’ll just have a ton of positive reviews?

Yeah, probably. But this isn’t a review site. It really isn’t. Other people do that ‘unbiased, thorough’ sex toy review far better than I do. I’m interested in passion, and delight, and the hot things people do. Ideally I’d like this to end up as a bunch of sexy stories about cool experiences rather than a testing database.

How do you know people will actually write about the products?

I’ll pay for reviews/posts/stories after they’ve gone live on the site. In theory, you could grab yourself a free sex toy and then never contact me again, but I always like to begin by trusting people – most people are actually pretty trustworthy.

Will you use my real name in the post?

I will use whichever name you want to go by, whether that’s ‘Anon’, a pseudonym, or your real name. I’ll also link to your personal blog/Twitter if you would like me to, but not if you’d rather I didn’t. It’s completely up to you. The only person I’ll share your details with is, for the purposes of sending you the product that you have requested.

Do I have to be based in the UK?

Argh, I hate this question because the answer right now has to be yes. It costs more to ship to other countries – I’m really sorry. I 100% promise that if this goes well in the first few months, I will look into expanding it more widely.

To be honest, when I first started this blog I didn’t realise how much traffic it’d get from other countries, so this is something I’m trying really hard to work out for all my stuff – I want to treat everyone fairly and give everyone the chance to join in with giveaways.

How much are you getting paid for this?

Nothing above my standard sponsorship – I basically come at a fixed price per month and all the other awesome ideas I have (like this one!) are like superbonuses. This one came about because the lovely Emma from SexToys kept offering me things, and I thought it’d be nice to spread the love and share ’em with you.


  • Vida says:

    Humm… if there was something I really wanted, I’d pay postage first, I guess, that seems fair? Something to consider for non UK people?

    Also, I love how ‘benevolent sex fairy’ implies that there are also malevolent sex faries :) Scaryscary.

    • Girl on the net says:

      That’s definitely an idea, although it cancels out the ‘free’ness of it. Until now I’ve just offered to pay postage for people who live abroad in comps where it’s open to them, but I reckon there might be a better way. Am working on it =)

    • Girl on the net says:

      I know, it’s a pain in the arse. BUT I’m working on it. Soon I will conquer the world… or at the very least be able to ship to it =)

  • Kinky Lad says:

    It’s too bad that Sextoysuk are not like some others and can ship either for free or shipping cost outside the UK. Not that I am any sort of writer anyway but good for those that are such as GOTN.

    • Girl on the net says:

      They can ship outside the UK, it’s just expensive. It’s not really their fault, it’s just how the postal system works, and I don’t want to tie them in to something that might mean they have to fork out to ship, say, something massive and heavy halfway round the world. That wouldn’t be fair.

  • Anonymous Mark 98752 says:

    Another groan for not shipping outside your pathetic island nation (I live in a much bigger island nation). I really want to get a free masturbater (such as the 3D POLYGON thing). Oh, yes, at present all I have is some hands that don’t work nearly as good. Assistance for those hands would be appreciated, not just by me, but the owner of said hands, as the owner doesn’t grip nearly as well or have quite the technique, to guarantee a quick resolution.

  • ValeryNorth says:

    I *definitely* want to write a hot story/toy review for you/ but I am having some trouble narrowing the field of potential toys to ask for/try out!

    The rules don’t seem to say anywhere, “one application per entrant” so I was wondering if it’s okay for me to offer a selection of ideas for what I want, and what’s unique about why I would like each one, and then you pick the one you like best (assuming you pick any of them at all, of course)? I’m not trying to blag loads of toys (although if you liked all my ideas, I wouldn’t say no to trying them all!) I just find it really hard to pick just one and say, “that’s the very best option to go for!” Especially as there’s two considerations: firstly, what I’ll enjoy, and secondly, what would make the best review/story options to appeal?

    If I can’t do multiple entries (that’s begging for an innuendo/double entendre, isn’t it?) then could you give some more clues as to what you’d look for? I’m guessing it’s better if the item hasn’t got many/any reviews already on their site?

    • Girl on the net says:

      Ooh, good question. I’ve had some awesome suggestions already, and a couple of people have suggested more than one thing so I’m definitely open to multiple entries. Given that I’ve had so many good ones what I’m going to do is keep all the entries ‘live’ as it were, so if something doesn’t get picked this month it still stays in the pot for next month – means people don’t have to worry about applying every month, and also means I get to make the most of all the good suggestions =)

      So I’d say if you have more than one idea feel free to submit a couple, although I think our criteria for choosing will mainly be based on ‘what sounds most interesting?’ which usually will be something someone’s really passionate about. It doesn’t matter if it’s got lots of reviews on their site or no reviews at all – the main thing is that it’s something you’re really keen on. Hope that helps! And please do submit – as I say, even if your request doesn’t make it this month, I’ll keep them all in the pot so it might make it next month, or the month after, etc.

      • ValeryNorth says:

        Follow-up question: how strict is the 50-word limit? The “backstory” on why I chose one toy in particular is hard to compress that far and still leave room to explain why that product and not something else.

        • Girl on the net says:

          It’s not too strict – it’s only so that I don’t have lots of essays to read – just to get a flavour of why a particular toy floats someone’s boat! Feel free to go over it if you need to!

          • ValeryNorth says:

            Great! I think the longest I have is under 100 words, although I cheated and did a (under 150 words) preamble as well. I’ll get my ideas emailed to you right away :-)

  • This is a brilliant opportunity for anyone, who is looking to step into the reviewing/blogging world. Shared this post, well worth it :) Good luck and have fun to all those who apply x

  • pinkanimal says:

    what a lovely oppourtunity for you to offer people!

  • Sunshine says:

    Great idea! Have submitted mine, looking forward to reading the review from whoever the lucky winner is!

    I guess sometimes we have an itch a finger (or two) just can’t scratch!

  • abbirode says:

    So… can my Irish ass enter if I was able to give you a UK address or does that break the rules?

    Really hope it doesn’t.


  • Desire on wheels says:

    Does your lovely Emma ever order in more items by a manufacturer than the ones they currently have listed? For instance, I really fancy trying some Liberator shapes, but while I may be fantasising merrily about what I’d do with my partner on a Hipster, realistically everyone says the large shapes get in the way, are a bugger to store, and just don’t get used as much as the smaller pieces. So I suspect something like a Jaz Motion, which don’t currently offer, would suit us better, and be more affordable for the contributing shop as well. (Assuming they are not going to go overboard and give us both, at which point we would have ALL THE SEX. And then none of the wardrobe space, but pah, details.) It’s very generous of them to offer this!

    • Desire on wheels says:

      Erm, not that I’m assuming I will get the honour of reviewing anything! But I would absolutely love to, especially the Liberator shapes, and after more time spent staring at the Hipster and reading reviews of it, I would really love to give that a try. So many potential things we could do with it… *sigh*

  • Jo says:

    Oh, UK… you’re such a fucking tease.

  • Chiia says:

    If this is still a monthly occurrence, would you ship to another EU country if we write the review without requesting payment? So you instead use the payment to ship it? It seems like it may work. I also have a US shipping address due to work in the government. I honestly just like sharing pleasure stories and the chance to try new free toys is a great enough bonus.

  • dean says:

    I just came across u page(that wasn’t meant to be a pun or I didn’t actually ejaculate over my phone lol 😁 I don’t like a sticky phone lol)but I’m really glad there’s more people like me,my friends thought I was stupid and thought there was something wrong with for buying my then girlfriend a vibrator but I had to try and explain vib

  • Adam says: get me this and I’ll be more than happy to record me fuckin the pussy arse and mouth Chuck in a dildo and I’ll also record on video me suckin the dildo plus fuckin myself wit it for you to post up on the blog site I’ll also record me fuckin the doll out in public somewhere

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