Guest blog: The hat trick – cum in each hole

Image by the fabulous Stuart F Taylor

I probably don’t even need to write an intro for this one. The awesome Focused and Filthy (@FocusedFilthy) – she of the astonishingly hot blog, gorgeous photographs, and deliciously creative fucking, is here to tell you about the ‘hat trick’. And by ‘hat trick’ she means getting cum in each hole. As I say, needs no introduction. As long as I’ve SEO’d it properly, this is going to be the one of the most popular guest blogs of 2022, possibly of all time (and I’ve been doing this for eleven years). Missy’s exceptionally filthy and joyous descriptions of getting cum in her mouth, cunt and ass live up so beautifully to the promise of the title, I have no doubt that this post will launch ten thousand wanks. Have at it.

The hat trick: cum in each hole

I’m greedy in the bedroom. I’m happy to confess that I love to fuck and once I’m in the mood and my horn is high, I just want it all. There is nothing I love more than having his cock right at the back of my mouth, squeezing his shaft with my tongue up against my palate as he shoots his load of cum down my throat… apart from maybe when he has me on my back, legs up over his shoulders, cock deep in my cunt as he shudders and fills me with his spunk… although perhaps it’s when he has me on my knees, head down with his cock pressed deep in my arse as he swells and throbs his juice into me. I can’t choose any single sex act as my favourite, there are far too many to chose from. There isn’t a single place I prefer his cum, because I want it all and in every different way.

And on some glorious days I get exactly that. The hat trick. Cum in each hole.

I’ve been with my fabulous husband for over twenty years and I’m not sure when we starting this sweet tradition but some time back, in my mid thirties (once my kids were a bit older and stayed in bed in the evenings) and my hormones roared back into life, we discovered the joy of the hat trick.

What is the hat trick?

The hat trick is when I get cum in each of my holes in just a single day. I wonder if the name came from the phrase I heard as a teenager that “any hole’s a goal” but it works for us. This doesn’t mean only having three sexual activities in the day, and it doesn’t mean only having oral for one or only having anal another time. It’s purely about enjoying lots of sex but having him cum in each of my holes. This might not have been a problem when we were younger but nowadays finding not only the time, but the will and the opportunity to partake in such filthy acts in one single day is a rarity.

It may be a quiet Sunday when – as we wake up – I take his nearly stiff cock into my mouth, teasing him with tongue flicks, wanting that sweet first shot of the day (the first one is definitely the sweetest). Then some lazy penis-in-vagina sex a bit later on and after that I might joke “maybe we should try for the hat trick?”

Even just saying the idea out loud tends to get me going. The fact he knows I’m thinking about him filling my holes with his cum. The idea of wanting some anal too. I love anal but I do have to work up to it. Plugging my arse first and getting him to use some toys on it. Making sure that I’m as turned on but as relaxed as possible, so I’m able to take his girthy cock in my arse.

The celebration of the hat trick is not only for his athletic ability, but the joy of achieving the combination of time, sexy inclination, space and sheer audacity of wanting to be absolutely full of his cum. To know that on that day he made the most of me and my holes. Staking his claim on me, marking his territory with his jizz.

The double birthday hat trick

It was my birthday in August, in the middle of two weeks off work and in between us being away. We managed a delicious but ridiculously hot hat trick that day. I’m not used to Yorkshire being so warm and it does make for incredibly sweaty sex. My husband’s birthday is in early September… and guess who managed a double birthday hat trick?!

This one began accidentally: it’s a nice birthday treat to waking up to some oral sex. A sweet breakfast in bed. He wanted to taste me too so I hopped into the 69 position on top to happily oblige. It’s not a position we use regularly but I was rather blown away with his quick-circling tongue on my clit. I find that if someone makes me orgasm while I have a cock in my mouth I have to gobble it deep down almost to stop myself from making any noise. Like it’s a reflex to get as much cock in my mouth as possible as my cunt clenches and gushes over his beard. That morning we were both rather turned on and my quick orgasm combined with fast and utter deep-throating meant he came quickly at the same time as I did. Leaving us panting and spent but not quite satiated.

After a second breakfast (cereal and toast) we sneaked back to bed while the teenagers still dozed and quickly found ourselves fucking again. I’m riding his cock, whispering to him about the woman I’m going to share that cock with in a few weeks time and what we are going to do. He said something incredibly filthy which I pretend to balk at and he laughed and said my clenching cunt gave my true feelings away. The filthier our talk gets the tighter I become until his cock explodes in me again. That time in my wet cunt.

As I rested my head on his chest I whispered maybe we should go for the double birthday hat trick and his cock twitched again inside me. Later on that day, after a family meal out and a few beers he grins widely when I suggest an early night. But a few beers in means we had a filthy long fucking session – started with oral and vaginal and toys in my arse before he pounded me with his cock. Finished off with me flat on my front, nearly his entire weight, pressing down on me and his cock in my arse. His filthy words spilling into my ear as I growled into the pillow, squeezing his dick in my ever tightening arse and enjoying the final swell and squirt.

I’ve been wanking thinking hard about having cum in each hole since then, and decided that I have two new hat trick goals to aim for soon.

First, going for three different people’s cum all in a single day – I think that would be relatively achievable as I managed four in a period of 48 hours recently. The other hat trick I’m aiming for is the three different people’s cum in each hole all during the same sex session!

I’ve not managed that airtight feeling yet, but that would be one hell of a hat trick to pull off.



  • Big Spoon says:

    Well this was a hot thing to find on my early morning “I wonder what GOTN has posted recently” phone search! I have actually thought about using my ability to multiple orgasm to do this with my partner during one sex session and am now wondering why we haven’t tried it yet.

    • Girl on the net says:

      All credit for this goes to the amazing Missy of Focused and Filthy – when she pitched me this guest blog I practically leapt out of my chair in delight. It’s such a hot concept, written so beautifully! *swoons*

  • John says:

    My goodness me.

    That is quite the most wonderful read and has me more than a little hot under the collar.


  • ftandhubby says:

    Yes! Yes to the hat trick with her husband. Yes to the hat trick with cum from 3 different people and yes again to the triple hat check with 3 people doing each hole 3 times. Very hot. It’s great to have goals!!!!

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