Questions I’d love to ask the man I’ve only fucked twice

Image by the fabuloua Stuart F Taylor

I’m not going to tell you about the first time I shagged this guy. I might in a later post, but not right now. By way of backstory, I’ll just explain that I’ve known him online for a while, and recently we ran into each other and fucked. It was extremely fun – so fun that we did it again the next day. I’m not going to tell you about that now, though, because after we’d finished round one, as his spunk was drying on my face, he asked “are you gonna write about me?” with such eager, puppydog energy that I thought it would be fun to make him wait. However, once I’d returned home (after washing my face, naturally), I did get the urge to write this. Publishing it might seem like a bold move for a woman who may never see this guy again, but fuck it: he has a kink that I’d dearly love to flesh out in my wank bank. If you’ve ever shagged a rich person hoping for a ride in their fancy car, you might understand a little of my motivation here: I really want a go on this guy’s kink. It’s the Porsche I’ve looked longingly at but never had a chance to properly drive. Something so gutpunch-wank-bank fascinating to me that I reckon its worth potentially embarrassing myself for. So instead of writing a true account of the first time we fucked, I’m gonna tell you what I’d do if I got the chance to hang out with him again. Here are some questions I’d love to ask of the man I have only fucked twice.

I’ve got a burning curiosity about his kink. The kind of intrigue that has my brain churning out myriad images of various scenarios, along with questions that I’m dying to ask about every sordid detail. “What is it about this that turns you on? The humiliation? The watching? Which specific scenarios are the hottest? Tell me about times you’ve fulfilled or touched on it – which of your past adventures have powered the most midnight wanks?” And many more questions besides. So very many more.

It’s a kink I’ve always wanted to play with. I’ve dipped my toes into it in the past yet never had the chance to dive deeply. But he’s told me bits and pieces over the years, little flashes of filth popping up in my DMs when I write a blog post he especially enjoys (and which, I hope he knows, I am always extremely annoyed he’s too respectable to retweet) and even just the tiny snippets he’s revealed make me primally horny.

Some types of lust are a fizzing shiver of intrigue: you like the sound of it, but you’d have to give it some thought to be properly sure. Check out some porn, picture the scenes, fully wank on them before you embrace them entirely. Other kinks give off a spark of promise but need more fuel to get going: you’re a tiny bit hot for spanking in theory, but in practice your partner’s eyes light up when you threaten to bend them over your knee and you can get extremely horny for that. There’s a scale of kink-temptation, see what I mean? The way I feel about this particular perversion is far beyond both of those things. If the scale is one to ten, this one’s a Spinal Tap eleven. As I say, it’s primal. Fucking innate. When I think about the ways I might apply it in real life, this brand of lust thrums through the tendons at the back of my knees and neck, resonating deep into the part of my brain where the darkest, most precious things reside. It thuds through my veins like the Platonic ideal of the perfect beat to fuck to. The feelings I have for this kink make me trembly-weak and kitten-limp – certain beyond all doubt that this one’s perfect for me.

If he agrees to meet me for a drink, here’s what I’m going to do.

“Tell me…”

I’ll meet him in a bar: somewhere fancier than I’d usually frequent, because I’ll have to book a table. Request one in the corner, somewhere quiet. Sit him facing out towards the rest of the bar so he can see if anyone approaches. This has nothing to do with the kink, I just want him to be comfortable and relaxed before we start chatting – the questions I’m about to ask are not ones you would answer with honesty if a stranger could be hovering over your shoulder unnoticed. They are not to be answered in detail unless everyone within earshot has fully consented to hear.

I’ll sit him down, get a bottle of wine in, and when we’re both certain that we can’t be overheard, I will lean in a closer and say:

“So… tell me what’s hot about getting cucked.”

Cucked. Cuckolding. Yes, obviously it’s that. I love getting fucked, and I love telling stories, I obviously yearn for the chance to toy with someone whose dick will get hard hearing all the sordid details about how brutally someone else destroyed my cunt last Tuesday. When I was still shagging toyboy, once or twice I nudged him to see if his subbiness might extend to cuckoldry. “Do you like reading the blog posts about other men? Are they hot? I hinted, shamelessly. When it turned out the answer was ‘not specifically’ I backed off, of course. But I didn’t drop the idea completely. In fact, I literally have a blog post in drafts that I’ve been meaning to finish off for about six months – a begging letter addressed to literal GOD (aim high, people), the post is called ‘please send me a cuck’.

As I say, I’ve not had many opportunities to dive deeply into this kink, but my God do I reckon I’d get into it. Cuckolding. Someone getting off on hearing about/watching/listening to me get railed by other men. Sitting one guy on a chair in the corner of the room and making intense, unwavering eye contact with him while I get fucked from behind by another. Have you listened to Molly Moore’s Cuckboy yet? It’s phenomenal. Or maybe this story I wrote ages ago about cuckolding on the night bus?

I’m into cuckolding. I fucking know I’m into it. I know that like I know when I’m hungry and I’m thirsty and I really need to piss. So if I ever get to hang out with this dude again, I will grill him about this particular thread of deviance, gulping down knowledge like a horny succubus, fueling my wank bank for later.

I won’t guess at his answers in this blog post. It’s presumptuous enough of me to write speculative fanfic about this man, I’m not going to push my luck (or put my thumb on the scale) by trying to predict what he might say. Barring the standard Big Red Lines that are my own hard limits (nothing illegal, no age/race-play, no permanent scarring, etc) there is not a single answer this guy could give to the questions I might ask that wouldn’t make my thirst for this kink stronger. Truly there are no wrong answers.

The pleasure is in learning about cuckolding from the zoomed-in perspective of a single dude: depth not breadth. Teasing those words from his mouth. Enhancing my understanding not from Fetlife or Kink of the Week or Twitter, but from the lips of a real-life man who – in the afterglow of the first of the only two shags we’ve ever had – told me “I don’t have to be second, it might actually be hotter if I were third or fourth.”


Some kinks are a fizzing shiver of intrigue, and others are ones you need to wank on. But when it comes to this kink, the second it’s mentioned, I’m already a mere flick-of-the-wrist away from coming.

What’s hot about cuckolding?

As I say, I won’t guess at his answers here. But I will share a sample of my questions:

  • the basic composition of a cuckold scenario. Is it hotter the more other people there are fucking your partner at once, i.e. is a gang bang hotter than a threesome? Do you want to be in the room while it’s happening, or is it sexier if you’re outside listening in (or elsewhere entirely, ignored and unfucked, waiting to hear details that you’ll wank about later)? Rank those scenarios in order of how intensely they make your cock twitch.
  • the physical actions involved if you are present. Which specific touches might act as cum-triggers in a cuckold scenario? If your partner grabbed your hand and squeezed it good and tight at the moment of climax as someone else fucked them… would that be horny? What if you reached out to touch your partner and they slapped your hand away? I’m pretty sure you’re into licking cum out of someone’s cunt but how about other kinds of spunk-play? What if they pulled your face towards them after sucking someone else dry, and spat the resulting load directly into your mouth?
  • the tone of a scenario. This one’s a challenge, especially as you don’t know me very well, but please do your best: can you picture a hot cuckolding scenario and have a go at articulating your emotions about it? Do you feel humiliated? Sad? Jealous? Used? Unused? Genuinely happy for your partner as they come tight and hard around a stranger’s cock? Which of these emotions do you feel, and – more importantly – what have I missed?
  • how have you fulfilled this kink in the past? (No pressure to tell me this, obviously: it might be private to the people you did it with and I don’t want to hear about anyone who wouldn’t consent to you telling me the story). Give me hypotheticals if you can’t share the truth. Getting a phone call from a partner, picking up, and just hearing them murmuring ‘please please please’ over the sound of the aggressive fuckstrokes of a total stranger? Or seeing them playfully sneak off, giggling and sssshing, into the pub toilets for a quick fuck with one of your… friends, perhaps? A friend would be easier to recruit to fulfil this fantasy – it’s what I’d reach for anyway, but then again I have some really pervy friends. No matter, I’ve thought of another question: which is hotter – getting cucked by a friend or a stranger? Better to have a go after the other guy’s finished, or is it hornier if you don’t get a turn at all?

See what I mean? I have a lot of questions. I don’t want to be presumptuous and assume he’ll want to go for a drink with me – and it doesn’t matter if he’s not up for it, I had enough fun writing this anyway. But even were I to get the opportunity to grill someone with this kink, I suspect I’d only manage to ask one or two of the questions above. Every answer would lead to further questions. More possibilities. Extra branches on the tree of filth that lead me further down the path to one specific brand of cuckoldry. The very idea of having this conversation is so hot that it feels like a cuntpunch. It doesn’t even have to be this guy, really. Any dude with a cuckold kink would do.

So there it is. If this guy agrees to come for a drink with me (I understand, incidentally, that he’s very busy and I want to flag that I am too, so I do not expect this to happen at any point in the near future, I’m just putting it out there for if and when he might fancy it [this is how I chat guys up now, apparently]), then the above post provides an outline of what to expect.

I’ll bombard him with questions, fill him with wine, and wonder – always – if his cock’s getting hard under the table. If he’s amenable, I might shuffle round so I can sit beside him. Rest my left palm gently on his crotch, continue sipping wine with my right, and focus on feeling for the throb that happens when I ask him a question that really hits home.

There’s a part two to this idea, of course. Fundamentally this doesn’t end with me downing the last dregs of wine and then shaking hands with him before saying goodbye. Part two exists both in my head and – if he’s amenable – sometime in the future if our diaries align.




  • ftandhubby says:

    Very hot kind of fun. I hope your new friend indulges you in what is apparently something you would both enjoy. So many facets to this. Will he watch?, just listen?….have a turn when the other fellow is done?…so many possibilities. When my partner has done this it is endlessly exciting. We tried numerous variations on the theme and they all work for me. She’s fucked alone, had me watch, used his cum for lube when I fucked her after, made me drive the car while she entertained in the back seat, had me drive her to a dates house and wait for her, come home dripping with her infidelity and sat on my face…. I loved it all.
    Got started with this when I was just a fuck buddy of hers and she’d come to my house after being out on a date but knew I could be counted on to give her some more no matter what condition she showed up in. Been together almost 40 years and she’s still turning me on by being one naughty girl!

    • Girl on the net says:

      Ahhh I am so delighted for you that you and your partner have indulged this in so many ways! Yeah I’m super intrigued as to how this kink might play out for him. One day maybe I will find out, but even if I don’t I will have a lot of fun pondering…

  • 30 year old scared virgin says:

    Augh, I don’t know how to meet someone like you, but I would if I could. Every time I read blog posts online written by women about cuckolding, its always about how they love their bulls, they want to fuck their bulls, can’t wait, etc. And maybe in another post they go on about how they love their husband the cuckold, because he’s a good father, great provider, supports her doing this stuff, etc. But they’re not motivated to write about bad they want to fuck their husband.

    You’re the only woman I’ve ever found who writes about wanting to fuck the cucks, how the cucks fascinate you, desiring the cucks for the fact that they’re cucks and not despite that fact, etc.

    • Girl on the net says:

      This surprises me to be honest. I have not been especially active in online discussions about this kink, but what I have seen of it is often very focused on the cuckold. When I see women writing about it, usually the hotness is focused on the dynamic, which by necessity revolves far more around the cuck (who would be the person they know and therefore can tease/play with in a psychological way). For instance, this beautiful piece by Molly Moore is very heavily playing on his feelings and the tone conjured by her wanting him to watch: This piece, which is a recent gorgeous bit of audio from Spencer Pritchard, is written from the perspective of the cuck and again his feelings/desires are very much the star of the show:

      In my experience on mainstream porn sites (and this may be one of the things that puts me off), it’s actually the guy(s) who is(are) fucking the wife/partner who are more likely to be dehumanised/ignored/treated like they’re less important than the cuck. Language like ‘bull’ (which, sorry, I find turns me off quite significantly) feels fairly dehumanising – as if the extra person is there purely as a prop to use in order to conjure feelings in someone else. If I’m honest, that dynamic doesn’t do much for me: I’d far rather do something like this with two partners who were both getting off on it. The cuck for the fact that he’s being left out/teased etc etc, and the other guy for the fact that he gets to be the star of the show. So yeah… Hmm… I’m honestly not sure I see the dynamic you’re describing pretty often, but perhaps we’re moving in very different circles.

  • Mactonex says:

    “Someone getting off on hearing about/watching/listening to me get railed by other men”

    Isn’t that your entire readership? :-)

    I certainly include myself in that definition…

    • Girl on the net says:

      Haha WELL that is obviously very nice to hear. Sadly I suspect that most people who enjoy the blog version of me would be horrified by real life me, so the key is to find someone who is the former without being the latter. Not an easy task, but a satisfying one to have a go at =)

  • Alfridus says:

    When you say “cuckold” are you referring to the man not being aware of the infidelity or “wittol”, who is aware & encourages the infidelity ?

    • Girl on the net says:

      I’m referring to a consensual cuckolding kink, as is extremely clear from the post. I am not talking about infidelity.

      I understand the desire to be a pedant if you reckon you know something that you suspect others’ don’t, but I’m afraid your pedantry is misplaced here. I have never seen ‘wittol’ used in a consensually kinky context – if it is ever used, it’s extremely rare. The person I’m talking about in this post would use ‘cuckold’, most English speaking people who have and indulge in this kink would use ‘cuckold’, search engines recognise ‘cuckold’ as a kinky term, it is so clearly the right word to use (especially when used by someone who – not to blow my own trumpet – is a professional sex writer with over a decade of experience writing copy to both appeal to people’s kinks and target the search terms they might use for them).

      The first page of Google for ‘wittol’ is dominated by dictionary-style posts explaining what it means. From what I can gather, ‘wittol’ is a word used for someone who knows of his wife’s infidelity but tolerates/puts up with it: that is definitely not what I am talking about. I am referring to the kink: the thing people do not ‘tolerate’, but actively get hot for. And when it’s the kink, the word is ‘cuckolding.’ Hope this helps.

  • 30 year old scared virgin says:

    Oh, you don’t have to apologize for finding “Bull” to be an unattractive term. You’re right, so much porn is so centered specifically on the cuck in those scenarios I find it’s both the bull and the partner, too, who are made to be two dimensional.

    This is a weird way to phrase this question, but where are these circles you move in? When I first tried to expose myself to kinkier people I tried going to fetish websites (Where everyone used the term “bull”) and BDSM munches I found online. But the former is commonly filled with people who are just there because they’re horny for the fetish, and don’t really talk about their lives beyond the sex. Trying to talk with them about any insecurity or fear surrounding cuckolding is damn near impossible. The latter, and this is nothing against them, was mostly people who were 20+ years older than me and way more comfortable about their sex lives than I’d ever been. Those munches are their way of getting together with like minded people and being open about how much they love their life styles, and I was way too ashamed of myself to be able to have that in common with them. I’m absolutely sure we move in different circles but your circle sounds way better than mine, haha.

    • Girl on the net says:

      I guess in reference to your question – the circles I move in are generally ones which are fairly open and sex-positive (or sex-welcoming), but I don’t spend much time on forums/sites like FetLife. I meet people via dating sites, via friends, via blogging (check out the blogs linked in my sidebar for more sex writers – many of whom have opened my eyes to a variety of kinks. Also check out the people who contribute to the fabulous Kink of the Week project: But yeah to be honest I can’t offer you any advice for a ready-made circle of kinksters who perfectly fit with you, because those things are built over years of work and time rather than ready-made for you to join in with. If you go to munches and meet people, and make friends with the ones you get on with (try looking for what you *do* have in common rather than focusing on ways in which they’re different), and keep putting in the work to build intimacy (open up, talk to them, ask questions if you need advice or want to find out more etc etc) then that’s basically how you do it. It takes time though, and effort, and there will definitely be moments when you feel out of place or unseen or like there isn’t somewhere that ‘fits’ for you – it’s worth putting the time and effort in. These kinds of communities/friendships aren’t the sort of thing you find, they’re the sort of thing you build together.

  • Mactonex says:

    yeah, that’s the trick isn’t it? – finding someone who’s as interested in the me we project as the me we protect.

  • C says:

    Pretty sure this post is the hardest I’ve got while reading your blog.

    Think it was the curious nature of the questions. Really hot to think about someone so fascinated with one of your kinks.

  • Big Spoon says:

    I hate the word cuckolding (and I know you have written about that too) but the kink can be super hot. Love this piece and the way it explores different ways of playing with the kink.

    My partner and I experimented with it in the swinger scene and it was kinda fun when we found the right men for it (we had too many disappointing experiences too unfortunately). For me it was never about humiliation, I just really enjoyed watching my partner tease other men, have fun with them and then having her to myself afterwards. I don’t really identify with the term cuckold, “kinky person into compersion” comes the closest.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Yeah I totally get it, and it’s not the nicest term. I think that there’s a fundamental difference in kinks between cuckolding and the other – have you heard the term ‘hotwifing’? Again, not the best, but I think it’s closer to what you’re describing than ‘cuckolding’. I think that the dynamic of cuckolding is predicated on the idea that seeing one’s partner get shagged by someone else *is or should be* somehow shameful or humiliating, and therein lies the hotness and the thing being kinked. When it’s not a subversion of this brand of shame, I feel like ‘hotwifing’ is the more accurate descriptor (but as I say, that term is blergh).

  • PushMeTouchMeUntilIGetSatisfaction says:

    You’re literally describing my idea of heaven. I was only thinking about it when I woke up this morning (how else do you think I ended up on the blog?!?!). I was laying in bed just imagining being married to someone who I never had (although it’s just as intensely hot to me imagining just being with someone I’m never with in that one way), who flirted, knew how to work me up but never gave me the main event, and revelled in ensuring I knew all about, saw and experienced her getting the main event every time.

    What I did about it was go find some porn of a guy being cucked and had a bloody good time but still wish it was my reality, and want it.

    So it was a lot later than planned when I eventually got out of bed….

  • Nick says:

    I stumbled across this one the other day, after you’d posted about on twitter, I think.

    It’s almost certainly because it’s a huge fetish of mine but the audio porn is one of the most erotic things I’ve come across (pun intended) in years. It’s such an intense experience and incredibly hot even with the gut wrenching emotions that inevitably come with it. I’ve been trying to answer the questions in my head for a week now, it’s definitely contextual though, different strokes for different folks.

    I look forward to the sequel.

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