I have a kink for misogyny

Image by the genius Stuart F Taylor

Dirty little secret time, people: I have a kink for misogyny. An intense, horny, fucked-up passion for men who will treat me like shit. And before I delve into some of my more detailed treat-me-like-shit fantasies, I wanted to do some preamble to explain why this is only ever hot when I’m playing life on ‘sandbox’ mode. What’s horny in my mind and during roleplay is actively horrifying in real life. In case it wasn’t screamingly obvious: that’s why it gets me really wet.

Note that this post includes examples of violent misogyny, non-consent and rape – both the fantasy versions (hot!) and real-life ones (not!). 

Over the next few weeks, I’m going kick off a series of fiction pieces that are basically just the fantasies I wank to when I’m alone, and as I do that you’ll notice certain themes. Being treated like shit is one of them. Being used like I’m merely a toy. Most of the stories end with me (or A Random Woman) getting copiously spaffed in, perhaps occasionally ‘on’, but they’ve all got plenty of spunk. Non consent is a big theme, too – most of what I wank to on my own could probably be classed as a ‘rape fantasy.’ Every story will have notes so you can pick which you dip into (and one of the stories is genuinely kind of tame and cute compared to the rest – entirely consensual and featuring no misogyny at all, like a palate cleanser), most have been softened in the telling. Not because I don’t think you can handle non-con fantasies, just because it’s boring if every tale is replicated, beat-for-beat.

Themes will emerge (and if you like those themes then you’ll probably want to chuck me some money on Patreon so you get access to bonus stories in the series – text and audio, in the same vein as above). But beyond all the other types of kink, I suspect you’ll notice one that shines out most clearly. Like a neon sign, in capital letters, that reads ‘YES OF COURSE I’VE GOT ISSUES, DON’T WE ALL’: I have a kink for misogyny.

Hot for misogyny roleplay

Note: this bit gets a little intense and features choking. If you don’t like that, skip to the next heading.

One of my favourite types of casual contact with a man is if he smacks me on the arse when I get up off the sofa, instructing me to grab him a beer or a snack. It makes me horny to be treated like a 1950s housewife. I enjoy being referred to as ‘wench’ with a cheeky growl.

I love it when men dump spunk down my throat in an off-hand manner. Like they’re not even excited I am there, just relieved to have found a receptacle into which they can dispose of this fucking mess.

I enjoy men I love and care for telling me I am disgusting and not worth their time. Sighing in a half-bored ‘let’s get this over with’ way when their cock’s throbbing and they’re aching for release, ordering me to bend over the sofa and then using me like I’m just a convenient hole.

I like it when men spit on me. I love it when they beat me. I adore it when they cause me pain purely because the sound of leather on skin makes their dick hard. And the way my body twitches in receipt of each ‘thwack’ makes their cock twitch even harder too.

One of my exes used to joke that I used a particular line so often during sex that it had become something of a ‘catchphrase’ for me: “choke me and my cunt gets tighter.” I was training him, see? I had noticed a few times that when he choked me and my cunt clenched, that would be the trigger that caused him to start pumping cum. So I started doing it deliberately. Clenching the muscles of my cunt good and hard around his cock when he placed his hands on my throat, deliberately milking the first squirts of jizz from his balls at just the moment when the shame started to wash over him, and he realised that – despite the disgrace of it – he was going to hold my throat tight and come inside me anyway. Unngh.

[Note: choking during sex is not safe – a thing this man reminded me of frequently, and which made him extremely cautious about doing it. This is almost certainly the key reason why I could do this with him, but why I rarely do it these days – I don’t know anybody well enough (or trust them enough) to actually let them choke me. Eventually this dude developed a system where he would tense the muscles in his hands but without putting more than the lightest actual pressure on my throat. Just enough that I could feel him there, not enough to cut off air flow or circulation. No, it’s not the same but yes, it does the trick. What’s more, it does the trick with less risk of stroke or other injury. One of my good friends has told me in no uncertain terms that I should stop doing choking at all (she’s a killjoy and I love her and she’s right). So I try not to do choking as much any more – the men I’m dating now don’t know this specific technique, and as I say, I’ve not yet got to know anyone well enough to want to try and teach them. So for safety I should advise you not to choke people either. It’s still hot to me though, and I miss it hugely: whispering ‘choke me and my cunt gets tighter’ then riding the waves that lead to that first shot of spaff. Unngh. Inject it into my… well… not my veins, my cunt.]

I have a kink for misogyny

As I say, over the next few weeks I’m going to start sharing some of my wank fantasies, by which I mean the films that play in my head, which I have carefully crafted and honed and varied and revised over two full decades of perving. In recent years, the ones I’ve shared have required some added consent cues in the text: punishment by proxy, for one, and Bachelor Party is a good example too. The last time I tried to do this and properly wallow in the non-consent was in 2012 – ‘Bad things my mind does when it’s unoccupied‘. Safe to say I got a bit of flack for it. Even safer to admit that I deserved a fair bit of that bollocking.

The story was about a driving instructor taking me to a deserted road, touching me up, and then dragging me out of the car so he could fuck me over the bonnet. Power imbalance! A creepy man! Being treated like meat! Forcefully fucked while bent over something! As I say, some themes emerge.

One of the core themes is non-consent, and the non-consent is rooted in misogyny. Misogyny isn’t just the spice with which I make my fantasies richer, it’s the spice, meat, gravy and potatoes. Every single grubby little meal with which I nourish my sexual self is made from ingredients that I despise in real life. So prior to sharing them, I thought I’d have a go at explaining myself. Not just so you don’t tell me off (although please don’t, I’m doing this with as much care as I can), but also to make sure I don’t fall foul of Patreon’s ‘don’t glorify rape’ rule in the Community Guidelines.

Offensive and graphic creations: We understand that artists sometimes have to push boundaries to create thought-provoking art, so we don’t review offensive and graphic creations with strict black and white guidelines. We instead review creations in the context of the whole creator page. However, we have zero tolerance when it comes to the glorification of sexual violence which includes bestiality, rape, and child exploitation (i.e., sexualized depiction of minors). This is true for illustrated, animated, or any other type of creations. Patreon reserves the right to review and remove accounts that may violate this guideline. We also do not allow other fringe sexual fetish creations, such as incest, necrophilia, or fetish creations that are hard to distinguish from non-consensual sex. We understand that some topics on this list such as incest or rape are a little bit more complicated because these situations are, unfortunately, part of real life. As a result, when reviewing these types of creations, the Trust and Safety team will take into consideration context including personal, historical or educational narrative. For example, survivor stories or fiction such as Lolita are allowed on Patreon.

Emphasis mine. I’m taking you at your word, Patreon, please don’t let me down: I lose my livelihood if you ban me.

Everyone else, take note, I am going to great pains to explain the difference between fantasy and reality so I can say with clarity and conviction: this is not an excuse for rape. I am not glorifying real-life rape, or indeed real-life misogyny. I am, in fact, indulging in a little more self-kinkshaming than I’d normally like in order to make this as clear as humanly possible.

Fantasy is not reality, often it’s the literal opposite

These fantasies are ‘live-in’ ones rather than ‘live-out’. I enjoy living in them, inside my head (and sometimes as a game in real life, with the right man), but I wouldn’t want to actually live them outside of that very safe playspace. They are inspirational, not aspirational. They live in a teeny toybox inside my head, where I can safely take them out to play then put them back once I’ve come. I don’t actually want a driving instructor to rape me. Failing to make this clear (or give any context whatsoever) is where I fell down last time, in my opinion.

Actual rape isn’t hot, it’s disgusting. Actual misogyny isn’t hot, it’s … I’m gonna go with ‘dull’ to be honest. Most of the time it’s boring. Obvious, tedious shit that I hate having to wade through. Occasionally misogyny can be frightening, and it does often lead to some truly appalling things, but most of the time it’s a low-level background hum to my life: comments I have to trash, emails to ignore, tweets I scroll past with an eye roll. Men I have to stop dating because they treat me like a Rubik’s Cube to solve instead of a person with whom they might connect.

I don’t find this everyday misogyny horny. Nor do I find it hot if men try to smack me on the arse and call me ‘wench’ the day I meet them in the pub. But in a safe environment, with a man who I know categorically is not a misogynist? This is role-play I’ll get extremely wet for.

Why do I have a kink for misogyny?

Let’s begin with the obvious, which it sometimes is worth stating: societal influence works on everyone. Just as boys and young men will be influenced by role models who display misogynist traits, so I too have been influenced by misogyny in the media. Society has a lot to answer for, that cheeky little scamp: it cast misogynists as leading men, gave them scripts that had them talk about (and treat) women like dirt, and then had them getting the girl at the end, often with a powerful and deeply horny fuckscene. Media gave us ruggedly handsome ‘bad boys’ who’ll forget your name but let you ride on the back of their motorcycle, engine throbbing beneath your cunt while you wrap your arms around someone who is distant and unknowable and bubbling with rage beneath the surface. Alpha male husbands who’ll demand your utter subservience but reward you with precious love if you do what you’re told. It gave us broken men who need fixing, then promised rewards beyond our wildest dreams if we could be the one who finally ‘tamed’ them.

Society gave us James fucking Bond and Don Draper. Han Solo and Indiana Jones. Gaston from Beauty and the Beast. Bella Swan’s Edward and Ana’s Christian Grey. Deeply narcissistic but temptingly fixable Jeff Winger from Community. Jimmy McNulty in The Wire, so drunk he can barely see, fucking a woman whose name he doesn’t know over the bonnet of a car outdoors in public. The incomparably grumpy Mr Darcy! Heathcliffe! Wing Commander The Lord Flashheart, if you please. (And oh how I do)

It isn’t just boys who are influenced by that sort of thing. The media I consumed since I was a young girl showed plenty of misogynists in a deeply flattering light.

(although I’d argue that Flash actually sits outside of the ‘misogo hot men’ narrative – he’s simultaneously playing into it and sending it up. Thanks to the genius of Rik Mayall, Lord Flashheart transcends misogyny: I have spoken)

Society asked women for subservience and promised us these men in exchange for good behaviour.

So yeah. Duh. Of course on some level a bit of my brain wants misogynist men to do bad things to me. I’ve been told by society that the worse men treat me, the more intensely and passionately they want my ass.

*giggles, twirls hair*

The sandbox of misogyny kinks

I also have a huge kink for things that are taboo. If something is dangerous, harmful, or otherwise appalling then on some level I’ll probably want to kink that. What better way to exorcise demons placed there by truly violent men than to roleplay that violence in a safe way? One that also happens to make me come like a sheepdog to a whistle.

We’re playing in a sandbox! It’s all good! Behaviour we’d condemn in real life often turns to fun when we’re in sandbox mode. Do you smash up the sets in a Lego video game, enjoying the ‘chingchingching’ sound as you collect the jewels that spill forth? Do you ever daydream about pushing your boss into the photocopier, and having it swallow them like a weird plastic Audrey II? Ever mowed down a pedestrian in Grand Theft Auto or creatively tortured an entire houseful of Sims?

Then you’ll get this.

I would never want to claim that ‘everyone’ shares a particular fantasy, and I need to make it clear that I don’t speak for every woman: each individual will have different kinks and triggers, and just because this explains my kink for misogyny that doesn’t mean every woman will share it, or even that those who do share it like it for the same reasons. But I reckon most of us have at least one or two ‘live-in’ fantasies: ones we enjoy exploring in our heads but would never want to experience in real life. I remember a while ago reading a blog from a man who fantasised about terrorist attacks every time he flew somewhere. He liked considering how he’d take down the attackers. Hero fantasies of intervention and rescue are very common, that doesn’t mean he was gagging for an actual go at it. Most of us aren’t.

Sandbox fantasies are ones we can enjoy if and only if they are not real. Like the fantasy I have about being one of the only women left at the end of the world (OK, fine: the only woman. I genuinely do not have enough self-worth to think I could get laid unless every other woman had been destroyed in nuclear armageddon lol), it’s a fun space to play in but the reality would be terrifying. I’d miss my women friends. My sister. My fucking Mum. I don’t really hope that all the other women disappear so I can get gang-fucked by a selection of the horny men who are left over. But sandbox, see? It’s fun to imagine. And for me, the ‘gang-fucked’ part needs spice to give it power and oomph. I can’t get hot for the simple concept of ‘getting shagged by a team of men’ alone: there needs to be plot. Motivation. Backstory.

And 90% of the time, the ‘backstory’ that my brain chooses is deeply rooted in misogyny. Usually dismissive or entitled misogyny, but sometimes the violent stuff too.

Men who treat me like I’m worthless – a toy to be used or a resource to be shared. Men who will order me to suck them off while they do something else (like write code, or eat a sandwich). Men who are so horny that their consideration for me as a person drops off the bottom of the scale of importance when compared to how vital it is that they get their dick in something. Aggressively entitled men who do not care for my feelings or needs. At the more extreme end, this sometimes means rape.

Misogyny in real life

In real life, I fucking hate misogyny. I despise the Don Drapers of this world – the ones who treat women like we’re accessories or objects. The men who view us as convenient holes who should shut the ones in our face unless there’s a cock sliding in. I despise these men, and I hate this attitude, and if someone were to display it on a first date, I’d be gone.

Because here’s the thing, my lovelies: misogyny is only hot to play with when we’re in sandbox mode. Just as you wouldn’t rob a Lamborghini and go haring round central London knocking pedestrians over in the actual, real, not-GTA-world we live in, so I wouldn’t spread my legs for a guy who couldn’t see me as a person (well, not on purpose anyway: we all make mistakes).

Misogyny is disgusting in real life, and so is rape. To most of you this will be blindingly obvious. I imagine it’s obvious to all the people who contributed examples of hot misogo men for the earlier section (thanks Twitter team!). But it isn’t always obvious to those who don’t share this kink. In the past, when I’ve talked about it, I have often received comments from people who are baffled by what they see as cognitive dissonance.

“But GOTN,” they cry, “I thought you HATED misogyny! I thought you were very anti-rape and anti-sexism and anti all these things you’re now telling us you masturbate over!”

To which I can only reply: sandbox, bitches. It’s where I like to play. It’s how I can enjoy the fire without getting fucking burned. Being a feminist with a kink for misogyny isn’t cognitive dissonance, as far as I’m concerned: it’s two sides of the same coin. If I had never been on the receiving end of some painful (and sometimes violent) misogyny, or if I didn’t live in a society where misogyny was lauded and romanticised, I may well be kinking something else.

The taboo is the point. The fear is the point. I don’t have a kink for misogyny despite my hatred of it, I have a kink for misogyny because I fucking hate it. The roleplay I act out with men in real life is only possible if those men have proven they are safe, and I can be confident they’ll stop in a nanosecond if I let them know we’ve taken things too far. These fantasies are only hot as fantasy. And as I say, I’ve softened the more misogynist ones in the telling. I’m hoping that I’ve done it in such a way that those of you who get this – who also share a kink for misogyny and an understanding that real life is different – can enjoy them the same way that I do. And those of you who prefer your stories a hell of a lot more consensual can focus on the consent cues I’ve tried to weave in, and enjoy the rough scenarios from a slightly-less-non-con space.

Most importantly though, I hope this satisfies Patreon. Please don’t ban me, I’m really very nice, and I’m doing my absolute best to present these things in as consensual a way as possible, with as much added context as I can to stop wilfully ignorant real-life misogynists from using it as a ‘how-to’ manual.

First one goes up next Sunday. Join me in the sandbox, my friends. Let’s get messy.



  • Jak Marshall says:

    Sandbox fantasies are a great way to safely work out these kinds of feelings in a healthy way. Post nut clarity certainly beats pre nut psychosis.

  • Tony says:

    So looking forward to this. Have to say, that illustration is *fabulous*, one of Stuart’s best.

  • Valery North says:

    So much of “what it is that we do” is about making sure the boundaries between the fantasy box (or sandbox mode) and what is a part of the real world, are clear and understood by both sides. While also, sometimes, making the sandbox seem as real as possible, because that makes it hotter. (Kind of reminds me of the Carl Rogers line about empathy in person-centred counselling, specifically the qualification, “without losing sight of the ‘as if'”)

    I’ve written on my blog about “playing the hate”, adopting a role of this monstrous misogynist or racist or whatever, because my partner wants to kink on that forbidden and dangerous aspect of society without it being genuinely dangerous. And it’s sort of scary to have that in my repertoire, but also, I live in a society where those things exist and permeate our experience so – maybe being able to put it in that box and have it be not-real, is a good thing.

    And the whole thing about non-con fantasies and violence, degrading, disgracing, dismissively treating a partner, comes from a place of taboo, and because these are *powerful* and *scary* emotions to engage with (both those in myself, and those they produce in a partner), and that makes them hot – only when they are in sandbox mode. The idea of doing any actual harm to a partner (or even inadvertently making them feel genuinely bad about themselves) is horrifying and dreadful – which somehow makes it the hottest thing to roleplay and fantasise about.

    (And that’s before we get to the amount of time I spend on my feminine genderfluid side, fantasising as much about being the fiercely-resisting victim of aggression and stuff – and where all that scrambled mess of my sexuality and gender identity comes from!)

  • The One says:

    Very relatable. If you’re a cis het female sub (and I am), misogyny kink that conflicts with your rock hard feminism is baked right in. Patreon please take note – important sociological discussions happening here 🖤

  • Lawrence says:

    So this post is: really interesting, quite hot, and highly relevant to my life at the moment. I’ve learned/been taught, from the very beginning of my sex life, to be a GGG. I’m attentive, I reciprocate, I try to make sure she cums first; and in any event, I’ll do my damnedest to make sure she has a good orgasm by the end of the session. Now the lady I’m currently (doing things with), is REALLY into misogyny play. Her idea of a good time is for me to show up at her place, rip her clothes off, jam my cock down her throat and pull her hair and slap her around and make her cough, gag, and cry; then throw her down on the bed and use her cunt and other orfices for my own pleasure. This is all fun and lovely and very hot, but it’s also antithetical to my nature. So, Gentle Blogger, at what point in the afterplay does one turn off the mysogony sandbox, and attend to pleasuring her, or cuddling, or a combination? Or do you? Is the hot rough selfish nasty sex the point, to be relived in a masturbatory way later on? This is all kind of uncharted territory for me.

    • Girl on the net says:

      Oh this is SUCH a good question, thank you so much for asking it. I think the fact that you’re asking is a very good sign that you’re an excellent partner for this kind of play, because you’re rooting it firmly in its fantasy-not-reality context and that is so vital with this sort of thing. I don’t think I can give you a definitive answer, but I have two points which I hope can help steer you in a useful direction so you can have some chats with your fuckpartner:

      1. I would imagine that ‘when to turn off the misogyny’ is a very personal thing, and may well depend on the situation as well as on the individual. Some people might want you to continue the play beyond the cum shot, and in fact for many the act of *you coming and not them* may be part and parcel of it, so the actual scene doesn’t end until much later when you’ve wound down/switched tone or they’ve had a lovely wank to wrap things up. For others they might want it to end at a very defined point, or have a distinct cue (verbal, physical, whatever) that signals ‘we’re done with the mean bits now, back to being friends.’

      Two examples, at each end of this spectrum: in the past I have often *really* enjoyed being used just before bedtime – he rolls me over, tells me ‘sssh’, maybe smacks my arse or something, or puts his hand over my mouth (unngh) then just slides it in, fucks like he’s wanking, and dumps his cum in me (double unngh). In that situation him *rolling back over and completely ignoring me when he’s done* can be RED HOT. Sucks for getting any sleep because I’ll probably be too horny and need to run to the bathroom/spare room for a wank, but it’s lovely for the misogyny to continue there, because part and parcel of what I’m wallowing in is his total disdain for my pleasure up to and including just falling asleep once he’s finished.

      At the other end of the spectrum, I have had some truly *brutal* beatings from various people, and there comes a point when I just go ‘actually yeah I am done with being abject now and I think I need to stop’ where I’ll ask someone to cut of the misogo stuff when we could technically be considered still *partway through a scene*. I’m not safewording or distressed, I just realise I have hit my limit – my body is too full of adrenaline and my head is buzzing with thoughts and feelings and I feel fully and firmly *done*. This scene: https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/maelstrom-of-fuck/ got really intense, and there was a moment when (I think?) he came, or she came, or something, and that made for a neat fullstop (or at least a pause). They ordered me out of the room to go and kneel in the living room downstairs while they did giggly playtime. I ran off to do as I was bid, and as I did it my legs were trembly and weak and I needed a pee, so I stopped in the bathroom and then went downstairs to collapse. While I sat there, I realised I was very much done. Not like ‘come’ or ‘fully sated’ but just ‘my body was shaking and I was so full of adrenaline that all I wanted to do was be alone for a short while to chill out and calm down’. So I got dressed and when they came in I just said ‘I think I need a break/smoke’ and then after that we had a big hug together and then I went home. I suspect to an outside observer it may have looked like I was a bit brusque/rude (but they know me, it’s cool) but it was more just like… hmm… my sex tank was full to the brim and I could not pour any more fuck into it. They offered to walk me to the station but I wanted to be alone. Not in a bad way, it was just what I needed right then (I was enjoying remembering all the things they’d done to me, and I wanted to cement them in my mind rather than push them out of my head with smalltalk).

      So! As I say. It’ll be very different in different scenarios, and for different people. There are lots of ways you can work aftercare cues into your scenes – if you can get your person to give you a verbal sign (‘I’m done now, thanks!’ or ‘LOVED that, now I’m tired’ or ‘please make me a cup of tea’ or something – a request for tea is usually a nice way to signal ‘time for aftercare’), and if they’re nervous about a verbal sign, how about a physical one? When I play the bracelet game with my partner, I put on a piece of jewelery that denotes ‘you can fuck me up’ – https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/tear-off-my-clothes-bracelet-game/ – maybe something similar, like a bracelet that can be slipped off when the fucking is done would be good? Or you denote a certain room that you’re gonna play in and when you move out of that room the misogo play is over? Personally I think verbal cues are best, they work best for me, but definitely discuss with your partner and try to get a feel for her preferences. She might be all-in on the aftercare and have very specific ideas about it, or it may be something she’s not really considered before and talking it through can help both of you come up with a cool routine that works well.

      Remember too that not everyone needs or is into aftercare – at least not aftercare in the cuddles-and-tea sense. Personally I absolutely HATE the message that ‘aftercare is vital in all scenes’ because I am an introvert, and I also used to be a smoker, so for me often what I needed at the end of an intense spanking/kink scene was to be LEFT THE FUCK ALONE and ALLOWED TO GO OUT FOR A CIGARETTE. Ten minutes of alone time is often my favourite way to reset, then I’ll hop back inside and offer to put the kettle on/make cocktails and that way we know we’re friends again.

      2. Aftercare isn’t just for submissives. These types of scene can really take it out of tops as well, especially if you’re playing a role you abhor in real life. *You* may need stuff from an aftercare scene too – reassurance that what you’ve done was welcome/wanted, or feedback on things that were particularly hot. It is 100% completely OK, and indeed very good, for you to also have aftercare needs (including alone time if you need it – but try to work this into a sequence with your partner’s needs if they require hugs etc – sometimes dispensing hugs is much easier after a scene if you have pre-agreed that you’ll also get an introvert break afterwards. I’ve found this useful when I’ve been domming people). Have a think about what you might need and what would be helpful, and initiate some chats with the person you’re (doing things with).

      I do hope this is a good place to start, as I say it can’t be a complete answer because that one is for you two to write yourselves, but I hope this gives you some useful prompts to begin that conversation. It sounds like you’re having lots of fun and you’re approaching things with care and kindness, so – fuck on my friend! And enjoy =)

  • fuzzy says:

    First, I love your extended reply to the comment above as much as the post. Secondus, as someone who has a full spectrum of shame/humliation/degradation kink, I am so running parallel to your post. This line hits me particularly intensely: “…Every single grubby little meal with which I nourish my sexual self is made from ingredients that I despise in real life….”

    In RL i’m a hobbit by temperament, and cuddling on the couch and reading out loud every night before bed are daily activities. On the flip side I crave for my partner to tie me down (or up), rub herself all over me so I am drenched in her scent, then piss on me and leave me there while she goes to check email. Etcetera

    So I’m looking forward to this series, but this post is much appreciated. Thank you.

  • TB says:

    Very interesting. My partner and I have played around in this area and it can be a huge turn on for us both. I think a big part of that is not just the kink itself, but how much it subverts our respective personalities. I’m a quiet introvert, she’s an outgoing and unashamed feminist so to interact with each other in a completely different way that would never happen outside of the bedroom can be incredibly hot.

  • Kate says:

    About aftercare. I’m having this partner/boyfriend right now whose kink is me being submissive. He likes giving me orders during sex, being very rough and ultimately bonding me so hard that I can’t even move. And it’s totally fine with me because it’s consensual. We’re discussing it before it happens but we’re not going through every detail. Also because the suprise what’s going to happen turns me on too. Even when sometimes he’s hurting me while fucking. I don’t mind being submissive and I like that because in every other circumstances I’m totally different person. And he’s a really nice and thoughtful guy. But there’s the aftercare problem. Me and this guy are not always having this kind of rough sex but when we have we both are usually satisfied but also confused. After our first more ‘brutal’ bonding we were just too tired to think about if we should cuddle or kiss. But after second or third time he thought he went too far so he made me a bath (!). Yeah, maybe I cried a bit during that fucking but I didn’t ask him to stop because I didn’t want him to stop. I’m just into exploring my personal limits and I love when guys share their filthiest fantasies with me. Anyway this bath thing was so strange and for me somehow inappropriate but he was also so pleased with himself that he took such a good care of me that I couldn’t tell him I was alright with sex that evening but not alright with his aftercare idea. He’s never done that since and we’re still struggling sometimes with aftercare but I think it has to be like that if we’re roleplaying characters so different from us while fucking this way.

  • To good for my own good says:

    Thanks for this. Goodness. I don’t know where to start. And in my experience I don’t think you are alone in your kink. I suppose it is all good if the communication is good. But —as a certain type of man who has been raised in a certain time and way— I can’t go there. Not to be flip or cavalier about it, but I was generally raised to internalize the fact that we men are basically bad, abusive, unfeeling, evil. So, as a man, I’ve always felt I was on a special mission to be good, kind, non-abusive, sensitive, caring. And faithful. But it’s not as simple as that, I guess. Now it might be that being “good” isn’t enough; you also have to be convincingly “bad” under the right circumstances. Ugh. What a tightrope. And I feel that I’m exposing myself as unimaginative or worse by admitting that the slightest hint of misogynistic behavior (fantasy or not) gives me a limp dick. Tying up a woman, slapping her, or calling her a slut is a nonstarter for me. Although I can well appreciate that some (many) women might like it. Life is complicated, I guess. And, no, I don’t consider myself to be some sort of new type of victim or anything like that.

    • Girl on the net says:

      It’s strange that you assume just because I’m into this kink, you therefore are compelled to perform it. And Would you have commented similarly if I’d been talking about my kink for clowns, lamenting how you don’t want to throw custard pies in my face? Society has done a number on us all, it seems. For the record, not everyone’s into this and you never have to do sex things you don’t like: https://www.girlonthenet.com/blog/men-your-consent-matters-too/

  • Slow Learner says:

    This comment has taken a while to write for how short it is, but:
    I have kinda the inverse of this? Or the same thing, I guess? In that, I’m a bloke; in actual reality I want a _partner_, but when there’s a scene where I act misogynistically towards her; use her as a fuckhole, or…you get the idea, I know you do, I’ve read enough of your blog. Well, that’s…Umph. Amazing.
    Been really enjoying your blog series that’s followed this post, so thank you for that!

  • seri ♡ says:

    bro ur weird just bc one woman is into it doesnt everyone likes it please go outside in the real world

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